At least he's not an indecipherable hillbilly in this?

I fucking hate 500 Days of Summer.

He's going home, man.

Godmamet! You're making puns already?

Also: Contact, Kundun, Lost Highway, Austin Powers, Orgazmo, Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion, The Fifth Element, Con Air, Men in Black, Cop Land, Event Horizon and Gattaca.

Someone's just gonna be hacked to death in it, so why bother?

I remember counting down the days, just a matter of time before Chris Cunningham was the next David Fincher. It… never seemed to happen, did it?

And the VHS sleeve made it look like the tape was in his head… that was alright, right? Probably put more money into the home video design than the whole movie.

Dawn of the Rise of the Planet of Buffys

She also specifically said it wasn't him after many websites speculated that it may be. The only thing I see people really clinging to is that she said he was "basically a French film director" and everyone was like, "THAT MUST BE LOUIS C.K.!" even well after she had said, "No, it's not."

Darth Vader is totally Luke Skywalker's dad!

Oh, everything's fake to you! Socks, marriage, God….

Ugh, I was watching TV at my girlfriend's friend's house and some commercial for the HPV vaccine came on and the friend was like, "Blah blah blah, Big Pharma," and I meant to just roll my eyes, but ended up saying, "This commercial was funded by the CDC. Their only interest in in stopping diseases."

I always wanted to make a realistic drama about someone who joins a cult. Most cults are benign and won't result in a mass-suicide, and the above synopsis sounds about the closest I'll ever get to seeing the story I have in mind.

It takes a lot of work to plan and stick to an ending that bad for that many years.

"I don't really remember, because I was super young, probably a couple days old. Apparently, we hit it off."

I'm really sad that I can't find the video of Ted freezing, a la Poochie and dying on his way back to his home planet before he can tell his kids he settled on their mother before re-fucking the broad who couldn't give him children.

Starz

*Hulu and Netflix lip-sync for their life for the rights to the show*

Oh, and Joe Pesci's in it, too: