I took it to mean friend-zoned. Which outside of John Hughes movies, never works in you getting the girl. So either accept being friends with her, or be honest and move on.

Guys don't dump friends, they just fade away. That way, who knows, down the road your interests might converge and you're friends again. It's a very elastic concept.

Same thing happened to me.

Shut the fuck up. Your PC elitism is beside the point, and just an example of you being an asshole.

Football's proving to be the real life version of the game you'd play as a kid where you'd ask someone if they would take a year off their life for a million dollars

Marvel managed to do all of this without having anyone punch the universe and reboot it. The end.

There is a marked difference though...

Marvel is the unquestionable king of the ret-con, changing things about established characters and stories, rearranging timelines, etc., but they don't really do huge, universe-wide total resets within the established canon (this is why we got the Ultimate universe, after all).…

No, 15-20% is considered the normal tipping range for service. 15% for average, 20% for good, above that for exceptional. And if I mess up at work, there might be consequences, I just don't work at a job where the consequences are decided by the customer. And I wouldn't necessarily consider one mistake shitty…

Nah, the minimum tip for bad service is a complaint to the management.

Okay, have ranch dressing with your chicken fingers, but do NOT let me catch you adding ranch to your sweet tea!

As long as you don't pour it in your fuckin' iced tea, we'll all be fine.

HOW ARE YOU 19? Jesus fuck. You don't come off as a teenager at all, and I absolutely mean that as a compliment because teenagers generally just annoy/frighten me at my advanced age.

"As a palate cleanser for the last two weeks, please enjoy some stories of terrible customers receiving their just rewards."

Uhm, is that even a question?

Should I talk about the time my mother accidentally burnt a restaurant down?

I've been wanting to bring that shit up for MONTHS now. LET ME HAVE MY MOMENT.

I'm a meat eater, and super offended by what they did to you. Next time you go over to their house I recommend slicing open a Durian fruit and leaving it somewhere hard to find. HAHA, YOU MACHO MURICANS GET GASSED BY A PLANT!

I love it when people compare the rights of human beings to those of animals and think it doesn't make them look completely fucking ridiculous.

I eat meat but I do try to minimize the amount that I eat because the overuse of antibiotics and methane from cow farts are seriously damaging the environment and our health.

Even if all these women were somehow "mistaken," you would hope that Columbia would think that this guy is, at the minimum, a shitty individual who has questionable behavior around women, and maybe isn't somebody they want on their campus.