I sort of hope when the sentence is passed, there’s a big blowup from him about “whatever!  The White House was such a dump, prison won’t bother me at all!”

The faces of the security agents in the background are awesome, though. “Oh. Why the fuck would he leave the box?  We told him he’d get shot if he wandered off...”

You really think his kids would report him missing?  The only reason they’d report him missing now is to fight over any inheritance he might leave. 

Did he recommend taking a two week golfing vacation in response to your tragedy?  Because when his daughters died, he and Barbara ditched their other kids and fucked off on vacation for a couple of weeks to kick back and relax. 

The Ghost of Christmas Future showed Trump his grave, but Trump was just excited that people were pissing on it.

We would have gone through it at a time when combat medicine was 20 years less advanced, and we would have suffered much higher casualties as a result. We wouldn’t have 4400 dead and 32,000 wounded; flip those numbers and imagine whether the American public would have tolerated anything approaching thousands of dead…

Well, wearing a macho Talking Heads “Stop Making Sense” suit helps there. 

Grez, like Hillary would be any different, right? /s 

It was easily cured in Al Capone’s day, too, but he was too stupid and proud to tell anyone when his dick started leaking pus, and then it magically went away so he was never sick, until twenty or thirty years later he was suddenly suffering from the late-stage mental decline that would have been cured had he sought…

He’s always been a stupid asshole, but if you look at old interviews he’s a functioning stupid asshole in them. This is stress, long-term amphetamine abuse, a family history of dementia, and third stage syphillis all battling it out on the world’s largest stage.

He mentioned something about being wholly involved wit the Iran-Contra treason. Do we need to play the cartoon for you?

He reminds me of Eoin McLove from Father Ted, a surly idiot who’s famous because old women find him irresistible.

Imagine watching a movie and being stupid enough to come away with “man, that Indiana Jones guy really hates armbands.”  If people are telling Tucker to go fuck himself, it’s probably not because of his outfit. 

“Maybe you get the guns first, and then do due process later?”

“I’m 49 years old and I don’t think I’ve ever met a white supremacist,”

Which map makes the oceans looks small? This is a Buster Bluth  level of inept cartography.

Remember that Twilight Zone episode where the earth was falling into the sun and burning up and very hot, and the little girl had a fever, and then the twist was that it was all a dream and the earth was actually falling away from the sun and was really very cold? Maybe that’s what’s happening now.

“I say what’s the LAW!” Trump legal defense, 2019.

Clinton held off on retaliatory attacks against against Al-Qaeda after the USS Cole was attacked because he didn’t want to hand an incoming President an ongoing military action. Bush decided it wasn’t a big deal and wasn’t interested in fighting the good guys from Rambo 3 that his Saudi family friend Bandar Bush spoke…

Do you really think President Al Gore would have been playing cowboy on the day he got a CIA briefing titled “Bin Laden Determined to Strike Within United States?”