“After picking up the Subaru and driving it back to Washington, Eric woke up to find it stolen in Portland.”

Pilfered in Portland

He should look at the nearest fuel stations - odds are they’re an Oregonian and haven’t figured out how to use the gas pump yet.

Stolen in Portland. Is that like Sleepless in Seattle??

Heist!!!

Finding a specific Subaru in Portland. This should be fun.

Don’t forget that it’s an American design......

It’s a fairly common sarcastic phrase, so...

Can you run Lysol though a pressure washer?

We all have to die of something my man.

Good morning Robert. Will I ever change your view of drum brakes.

Only until she sees what a great cardio workout she can get. You both win!

It’s got potential. You could probably rent it out as an apartment in Seattle for $1,000 a month.

I have mental images of this going on in my head:

Man, my wife is gonna be PISSED when she comes home to find this in the driveway yard. At least I waited til after Valentine’s Day.

Needs a Partridge family paint scheme. NP

What’s the difference between a musician and a large pizza?

also, *waste

It’s whichever story will net them the biggest commission.