Borderline pedo is the way your ex describes you when you bag someone who isn't as old and fat as she is

IAndidn't realize there were so many anti-American Commie baby killers on Deadpan. He held a flag over his heart! Over his super patriotic heart!

Oh please Haslam had made nothing but positive changes since the end of the season.

I'm not saying that anyone's 'not smart enough.' I'm saying that this shit happens, but a lot of women use it as an excuse to bash anyone who disagrees with them. To them the term is a weapon, not a label to identify bad seeds, which is the whole problem. It's been polluted by people who would rather be drama queens…

As a non-Browns fan, I've just got to say; those of you that are Browns fans are a bunch of tough fucking bastards. Kudos to you for sticking with them.

There was a zombie game on Kickstarter a while ago.

what is this? Jezebel?

Jared: The Galleria of Jowlry

I'd love to finally see a montage utilize a song like "You're The Best Around".

Don't worry kid. I was about your age when my Cleveland Browns got housed by the Browns in two straight years. I had those tears too. But we had a great, young team, and I knew the best was yet to come.

Almost as good as Sad Romney Supporters.

She was not a celebrity. (At least, I don't think she was. I think she was a handler.)

A Michigan hat? Oh Mikey, I know you're a brainless lout who likes marshmallows on his pizza but even you have better taste than that.

If you have the party at your house you have to serve alcohol. No exceptions. You don't need to turn Timmy's fourth birthday into a rave, but for the love of god put out a few cases of Bud and a couple of bottles of Yellow Tail. It's my weekend and I am at your house. Maybe you don't drink. Well, guess what? I…

Not that ownership isn't a huge obstacle, but a new look can give a team a new outlook. It's a perception thing. Granted, the Tampa Bay example is loaded with factors like drafting Warren Sapp and Derrick Brooks — the most underrated exceptional linebacker of his generation — within a couple of hours, hiring Tony…

The bible says some really great things about marrage! We need to legalize this ASAP!

She hates soda in the house? Is your girlfriend some kind of fascist?

It's called "trolling". What you do is find a group of like-minded individuals and you find a way to agitate them by word or deed. Usually by being contrary or... Wait a minute. HEY!

Green Chile is really good too, but dont buy the canned stuff. If you are lucky enough to live in or near New Mexico, you already know this. If you aren't lucky enough to know what I'm talking about, come down and find out.

I think it has everything to do with the fact that he does not have enough letters in his name. Makes the Canton bust look dinky.