First: It’s a translation from the Japanese

The Old Pond

They’ve been steadily ruining the game for about 10 years. The PS2 versions were...ok. The PS3 era was decent, mostly. But since then, it’s like they have a committee solely to determine what ways they can make the experience worse from year to year.

His Letterman bits were pretty great!

Chris Elliot is a Goshdang genius. Sometimes. (Get a Life was one of the funniest things ever to be put on TV.)

Never change, Wales!

Peak <> wave

+1 for Scarletts Johansson. Also D&D.

Dirty Dangles, all day BRO! Snipers, 11 O’clock!

I need TP for my bunghole!

Michael Caine has great chemistry with Steve in this. Good choice!

Everyone needs a bung hammer to get the bung back in the bunghole.

Might be the best movie Steve Martin was in. There are a lot of very strong candidates though.

Invert Y!!!

Doing it right, carry on!

You... might have issues. Kidding, but that's some masochism right there. 

He is lucky I don't know him, if I found out he was beating an infant (or child, for that matter) I'd put him in the hospital or the morgue. Anyone who can do that is irredeemable and should be excised from the planet like the piece of garbage he is.

Cops are civilians (who think they are in the military)

There was no debate, you’re just an asshole.

Same. It’s always “you didn’t come to a complete stop” or “failure to signal lane change” or “5mph over the limit”....except none of them are true, it’s just a “my word against theirs” fishing trip.