Just tell your neighbor to rest assured, it isn’t because teens are having more abortions.

Hell no. My mother is constantly telling me I need to apologize because my father is getting old and that all of this is just a “difference of opinion.” Yes, I am of the opinion my husband shouldn’t die of a treatable illness because he had the misfortune of having cancer (at age 33 no less!), and my dad is of the…

I don’t think people grasp how HUGE a Desert Eagle .50 cal pistol is and the size of the bullet.

This is a tragic scenario for her and especially for her children, who will now grow up with a mother in jail and a dead father.

What, you mean that a .50 caliber pistol round, designed to be primarily used for hunting very big game or punching through substantial body-armour and still injuring or killing the target in warfare, wouldn’t be stopped by a fucking book?

Quick! Wrassle ‘im! Oooo… He’s a fiesty one, ain’t ‘e?

ICE

I’m a long time fan. R’Amen

Look, if the Founding Fathers had wanted to establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defence, and promote the general welfare, they would have said so.

“She’s a 125-pound, drooling, snoring, gassy, loud and silly girl,”

“The town hall meetings are not about sexual assault. I will repeat. These town hall meetings are not about sexual assault.”

I wish he had gotten the rights to do the musical as he was trying to do during the time of Diamond Dogs. Orwells widow wouldn’t sign off on it. Ah, what could have been...

Here in the States, farmers are sad because they can’t get anyone to help them take care of or harvest their crops. These farmers voted for Trump by a wide margin, but, gee-whiz guys.... they didn’t expect to suffer!

Personally I think the smart thing to do would be to have a second ACTUAL vote after negotiating prospective terms with the EU.

we should be a complete laughing stock by this time next week.

I’d be more inclined to like Savannah Guthrie if I hadn’t watched her lob softballs at Rand Paul this morning re: the Trumpcare bill dumpster fire currently going on in Congress. So much for holding anyone’s feet to the fire, NBC’s just engaging in shameless ratings grabs anymore.

One man was charged with the real-sounding crime of “unlawful use of a two way communication device.”

I detox constantly. Thanks, liver!

A handy pie graph to illustrate!