He lives on a golf course doesn't he?

Eat my ass kinja/chrome/flash/shockwave.

Is this some lame new Kinja layout I need to get used to or is Google chrome not displaying flash or shockwave or whatever other shitty thing properly?

Swimming goggles and a clothes pin

And you cleverly left out 1 Timothy 4:3

C'mon people, no recommends for this great joke? Well merry x-mas cobra!

I cannot tell you how many times I wished my f150 had a tiltable bed. Hydraulic lift, even a foot or two, would make dumping soil/mulch/firewood/etc SOOOOO much easier. Two-three feet would also make easy access for working on the engine.

Everyone in the world is a square.

1. Get wings: I get a large value pack of them at Krogers for $9-12. These are whole wings, connected at the elbow; normally these packages are from 15-17 whole wings so you are looking at 30-34 wings. Don't worry about cutting the joints, they fall to pieces once done.

If you want I'll give you a 'recipe' (it's just in my brains) that will give you crispy skinned, fall off the bone wings every time. And they're baked so you don't have to ruin your kitchen with a fry-baby.

Keeping it cold does what to the cheap stuff? Makes it better, taste less cheaper? I drink Old Overholt Straight Rye which is pretty cheap, and I would never drink it cold. Except with ginger ale, of course.

The real question is why are you keeping whiskey in the fridge?

Right because under Sharia law, gays aren't hanged. I'm still not entirely sure why gays would want to subject themselves to the humiliation of marriage.

What a nightmare that would be AMIRITE???

"I hit my turn signal as I exit the parking lot, and then all of a sudden all of the interior lights start flashing in time with the turn signal. Weird. I turn off the interior lights, and from then on, the power locks worked again."

Ouch. +1

Sweet toy, but it doesn't count because there is no way you could buy one that would last like that today for less than $4500.

The NFL's inherent racism strikes again.

You don't.

That's the only thing I can figure out. What kind of idiot doesn't take the toothpick out?