Thank you! I too was gonna get all Gift of Gab on this thread!

Sleazy "Jack" causes a TOWN-WIDE FREAKOUT.

Eat 2 pieces (1/2 the bar). 90 mg is just right for the saturday night super-high-me special; though please don't say I and the internet didn't warn you.

I think (maybe?) if you're very thin, as these models are, any big-ass honking carl's jr. anything if going to be visible in the tummers. Ditto for cupcakes. Especially in a photo. Remember when Brangelina was pregnant with twins & you could see the outlines of the feti in her pooch? Something like that.

I immediately thought of AH as well, based on Disney's Belle. But Alison Brie, YES! Also, Terry Crews should still play her father. Alan Cumming as Lumiere! Louis CK as Cogsworth.

Spermbots!

These days, 100% of Egyptian children are born illiterate. Smh.

I only care about this fanfic if the boys of 1D are hooking up with each other, and me, I guess. But that's really about it.

I should add, #NotAllSixtiesFemaleAdvertisingExecutives

YASS! "Orphan Skanks"!

Agreed! Attending school is infinitely more important that being sent home for questionable clothing choices. Most dress-code violators at my HS were offered to change in their gym clothes, put on a different outfit, or wear a jacket for the remainder of the day. Sometimes they (we) even got off with a warning. I…

Come awnnnn people....bra straps are bra straps and there is a time and a place for them. Joan P. Holloway Harris would never go for this. This is my old-timey reference to illustrate my discomfort of young'ns' underoos.

My Jezebel friends are the only people in my life WHO KNOW GHOSTWRITER. ALL YALL B*TCHEZ BRING A TEAR TO MY EYE.

I unabashedly admit: I am SO happy to see AP & little Nicky Kroll together!!

Amy Poehler IS UCB. She is my comedic pixie dream badass.

oi, I agree. I also don't think this acknowledgement of these teen parents in the yearbook glamorizes anything. Still glad I had that abortion sophomore year, no sarcasm.

It took me about 2 years to break them in, but i still wear them...11 years later. Same pair.

THAT'S who that dude is? Oh nooooo!!! Why is Colin so much nicer?? He really is, too- ran into him at a comedy event in Hollywood & he held the door for a fat chick & her chubby boyfriend (hint: that chick was ME!)

Please, oh please, oh pretty please, do yourselves a favor and find the audio of Tig Notaro telling her "Taylor Dayne" story. I know it was told at least once on Comedy Death Ray (now CBB) in 2009.

Heavens, no! Uncle Jack and Aunt Mimi? Jaden! Aiden! Caden...is that you from your summer house on the Vineyard? How did these Jezbians get our family photos? Where's my fainting couch??!!!