I’m not too surprised at how it all started, Siri has a reputation for talking back.

What about boxers, though? WILL SOMEONE THINK OF THE BOXERS???

It might qualify, but I’m not sure why the need to specify your sexual preferences in the beginning shows?

This just makes me so fucking angry and sad. A cop - a shitty, murdering cop - can (presumably) justify to himself in the moment pulling his gun to protect his cowardly life when he thinks his life is in danger after being hopped up on racism and crime statistics. It’s an evil act and a breach of the public’s trust,…

A baby bird in the nest that opens its brightly-colored mouth and makes a peep sound will be fed by its parents. It will continue doing this until it is a fully grown bird. Meanwhile, a baby bird that does not do this will starve to death.

Or as the Wilpons call it, a Bernie Madoff bobblehead.

I slept in classrooms. Nobody ever treated it like an accomplishment.

But they don’t want those Federal Programs cut. They like their corn subsidies, and being allowed to graze their cows real cheap, and being able to hunt on public lands. They want social security when they are old, and unemployment when they are out of a job, and disability when they get hurt. Those are the good…

Check your inbox

If they had two guns each this wouldn’t have happened. - The NRA

Unless she was prepared a certain way, in which case he could have been through the wurst.

Trump is the gift that never stops giving.

When I saw the tied up woman I assumed it was Baylor.

Ridiculous suggestion. Even if it were true that Peterson was descended from slaves that wouldn’t be the reason why he hit his kid, that would only explain his strength and agility while doing so.

I found Jerry Gergich!

Great move. Southerners love Cousins!

Dime Bags Two For One

S.T.A.B. - Smile To make it All Better

This guy sounds like he’s uttered the phrase “but it’s not a pyramid scheme” to all of his friends multiple times.

He clearly did nazi that coming!