I also HATE it when they know me long enough to know I don't do mornings but they STILL say things like "you look tired" or "are you sleepy" when my attendance is required at anything before 9am.

I'm feeling remarkably grateful that here in small town NH, we have no naked cowpersons.

I really hate these people, and the people dressed up as mascots and cartoon characters. Every time I have to even go near Times Square I feel such massive embarrassment and hatred of them. Getting in the way, being obnoxious and pushy... this isn't Disneyland, I'm trying to WALK on this sidewalk, not have to…

I am WAY more productive at night! Especially with cleaning. It's gotten to the point where I'm almost resigned to the fact that I should just wait until about 9PM to even try to get started. Same with work (graphic design); Often I don't get a burst of productivity until the normal work day is almost over.

Man, I could go on and on about the ways in which the world just is not compatible with me, the lowly night owl ;) I feel like it's constantly associated with laziness and being a perpetual teenager. I go to work, I get my shit done, it's fine. I'd just rather sleep 4AM-11AM than 11PM to 7AM. Everyone said I'd change…

Yeah, thats hiw I feel when studies determine that early birds are happier than night owls. I'd be pretty damn happy too if the society revolved around my schedule.

I think morning people are the big entitled assholes — they are so goddamn self-righteous and proud of their morning asses. They'll schedule shit for the ass-crack of dawn and act all superior when you show up shaking and looking like you just got whacked upside the head with a two-by-four. They brag about coming in…

THIS, so much this. The whole waking up at 7:00am and having to go to work makes me itch. Why can't the world start a little later?

I'm okay with this.

That's not negative personality traits, that's revenge for being forced to get up and face the day way too early.

I often get blank stares when I tell people it's physically painful to be up before 11 AM. So we're in the same boat, sort of.

I found a copy of The Andalite Chronicles at a rummage sale the other day and it BLEW MY MIND.

Animorphs fucked me up too bro.

hapless human whose mind has been completely taken over by an exhibitionist brain slug attached to his crotch.

I'm thinking this is the way to go. I like my beard hair, it's black, thick and not that scratchy. Yet my desire to out jaw my brother is strong. He has a jaw like fucking Gaston, it's ridiculous.

Obviously I have no idea what you look like, but I vote scruff. You get to show your glorious jawline while still maintaining a remnant of your old self. Win-win!

Beards forever! Though I do fear the day that "beard-bro" becomes a thing. Alas, I don't have the right stuff to grow a thick full beard, but I consider myself a bearded man in my heart. My mustache, however, is magnificent, and by far my proudest achievement.

From a practical stand, I can tell you that men with sensitive skin that have grown beards will never ever go back. Even if it's no longer trendy. Want to know what looks worse than an off-trend beard? Ingrown hairs on your face and neck.

No. Never. The beards are good. The beards must stay. The beards are magic.