Tebow, by contrast, looks exactly like someone who learned how to hit by looking really intensely at a pile of baseball cards and working backwards from there.

his first offense was referring to black children as lumps of coal

you do not need a doctor. you need anyone with irish ancestry who’s lost a grandparent to cirrhosis. basically the only question is if his liver or his heart is going to kill him.

Hell no, let him die of whatever it is. No big loss.

Steve Bannon looks like a mall Santa who got fired for beard lice.

Steve Bannon looks like he discovered freebasing discount gin.

This is more accurate than you may realize. The overlap of Sacramento residents who A) want an MLS team, and B) consider their city a “fine” one, is indeed likely only in the double-digits.

T-minus five minutes until your uncle’s Facebook explodes about a Mexican stealing something on his way over the wall.

Two great Yelp reviews I saw recently:

I’m the same. I just read the transcripts bc I.CAN’T. with her on video. Nope. This clip is safe to watch, though, even for us. I did. Because she’s out of her element, on a very liberal show, with a VERY established and famously popular host who actually ROASTED Cheeto at the WHCD one year!

Roses are red, nuts are brown,
Skirts go up, pants go down.
Body to body, skin to skin,
When it’s stiff, stick it in.
It goes in dry and comes out wet,
And the longer it’s in, the stronger it gets.
It comes out dripping and starts to sag,
It’s not what you think, it’s a Starks’s Teabag!!

As someone who is at 5 years with no family contact (because my family are the most miserable people I’ve ever met), I say good for him. You can’t choose your family, but you can choose who you allow in your life. If those choices mean he’s happy, then more power to him.

Rodgers is a transcendent quarterback who is forgetting about his family 50 years ahead of his peers.

Wtf kind of shoes is he wearing with a suit?

Here’s a +1, partly for you and partly to see if we can get a decent joke above the shit at the top of this thread.

It was even more painful when she added the flavor packet.

“she boiled a pot of water. Then, she walked over to Smith and poured it on him. When Smith didn’t react strongly enough for her, she started hitting him with her open hands, she told police.”

That’s not a hot take. It is a reasonable take. “Hot take” =\= “take I disagree with.” The Pats are hateable, and glowing support of a monster is a perfectly good reason to hate them more.