In goatee-loving circles, he’s God’s gift to women.

are you calling Robby a heterosexual?

They all look exactly alike, I can’t handle it. I just realized that I thought Jordan is Luke.

Please let it be Luke!

It’s like a #10 blade in the show horse-grooming playbook. Just buy some horse clippers and be a man.

ABC would have to hire an extra makeup person to blot that fivehead.

But will Luke actually speak if he's the Bachelor or will he just intensely make out/inhale during his make outs? Too much making out I can't.

I kept yelling “you aren’t even crying!” At the tv until my roommate told me I needed to calm down. His performance was absurdly unbelievable.

“It worked for me last season with JoJo”

Agreed about its precision. Is that regulation length?

Yeah but their stylists keep that stubble at the perfect length and I'm mad jelly

Nah, they are setting up War Vet Luke for it obvs.

He was obviously gunning for that with his new nose job and veneers on after the rose. And his attempt at crying when he got dumped by Jojo but with no actual tears coming out. Go away Robby!!

If Robbie is the next bachelor the producers better do some fucking good work putting together the roster of contestants because Robbie is negative entertainment. He’s like a waxy lump just BEGGING you to hit the fast forward button.

I thought for sure they’d make her pick Robbie so they could have a “celebrity” be the Bachelor (Jordan).

I love to hate Angry Chad. I love his highly visible security guard on all reunions. I love the previews with him and LACE(!!!!) getting it on tonight. But, like you, I hate him. #CANNOTWAITforBiP

Thank God our long national nightmare is over. Can I just say these two seem to deserve each other? Anybody gonna actually watch “...Paradise?”

I think that Jojo and Jordan’s relationship is like 30% physical attraction and 70% fame seeking. Almost EVERYONE on this show goes on it to enhance their brand/seek fame but Jojo just seemed almost more manipulative about it, if that makes any sense?? Apparently when she heard that Jordan would be on the show she…

Robby’s sociopathic hair did not even get wet in the shower.

Jordan is a complete fraud. Pretty sure we all know this - oozed the slimy, no-real-personality-of-his-own vibe. He seemed dumb enough to not be able to hide his thoughts as well, and I think we know that his thoughts were almost always “How am I being perceived right now” and “Did he/she believe that?”