EvilSassQueen

6/11/19

At the hospital when I was five, they told me they were going to give me 7-Up. They gave me Alka-Seltzer. Whereas if they’d told me they were gonna give me Alka-Seltzer and why I needed it there wouldn’t have been an issue. But I hold a very big grudge against those people.

6/11/19

Okay- now I'm really hungry!

6/11/19

What more? How about tacos?! they also contain the major food groups and go nicely with beer. #TeamPizza&Tacos

6/10/19

Raw broccoli is what you eat when all the carrot sticks from the veggie tray (with central ranch dipping container) are gone.

6/10/19

6/10/19

you are my people. i haaaaaated raw veggies as a kid (exceptions made for tomatoes and cucumbers) and while my parents dismissed it as something i’d grow out of so shut up and eat it, i hold firm to my stance well into my thirties. raw vegetables are, for the most part, irredeemable and disgusting. raw broccoli is…

6/10/19

why do kids need to eat raw vegetables? Steam them and SEASON them with AT LEAST butter, salt, and pepper, or roast the crap out of them with some olive oil and lemon. Bad vegetables are just badly prepared, and raw broccoli sucks.

6/10/19

My dad calls beer ‘steak and eggs in a can’.

6/10/19

It’s the whole pyramid. In pyramid shape.

6/10/19

I call beer a liquid sandwich.

6/10/19

I hated Ranch as a kid and I’d get mad when my mom would try to entice me to eat veggies by dipping them in ranch.. Like, ew, mom. Now you’ve made them MORE gross.

6/10/19

Gonna be honest, I would be very disappointed in my child if they fell for this shit.

6/10/19

Pizza is the worlds most perfect food. Veggies (tomato sauce), dairy, grains. What more could one ask for?

6/10/19

Pizza with veggies is salad

6/10/19

This sounds like something that people who make their kids skip Halloween would do.

6/10/19

Unless these kids have never been to a birthday party or had Valentine cupcakes at school, they know what frosting is. One glance at this abomination, let alone one taste, will only confirm that their parents are either idiots or liars, and render the offspring uncontrollable from that moment on.

6/10/19

I call soup a liquid sandwich.

6/10/19

Kids are just gonna suck on that straight from the tube and skip dipping veggies in it

6/10/19

Is salad a cake now or cake is a salad?

6/10/19

It’s probably just a good rule of thumb to never eat a “food” labeled in quotes.