Even with the six kids that box of garbage bags lasts FOREVER!!!

Teach me your ways

Laugh if you want, but the knowledge of never thinking you have one more roll in the linen closet and realizing you don’t? Never have to fear that again. Excuse me while I go out to the garage to check my TP levels as I’m heading to Sam’s tomorrow ;-)

That part.

You go through a lot of garbage bags when you have a lot of bodies laying around...

If this is wrong... then I don’t want to be right! I also have the old plumbing and I agree that CostCo is that sweet spot of nice, but not too much on the TP. I also run my household on my own and have a very busy life. I hate having to run to the store for stuff like TP, laundry detergent, dishwasher detergent...…

They could take the same honeymoon I did roughly 16 times. 

I just bought that toilet paper yesterday and I actually searched my bank records to find out when I had purchased it before, so I would know how long it lasted. Only 3 months! I was expecting a little longer. Still a good bargain though, means we only spent about $5.25 per month.

Hahaha I do this, well at Sams club, because  we don’t has Costco. But it’s so I only have to buy it like twice a year.  

That TP is the best, man. It’s just thick enough that it does the job but not so thick that the shitty [heh] plumbing in my house rejects it. It’s very good TP.

I can only assume that you mean in a series of 50 very hidden, very secure safes that you found on a pallet adjacent to the Costco jewelry section.

That’s how you hide all the vodka you are stealing...

IT’S A GOOD VALUE!!!

Have six kids and you will no longer laugh. That’s like a week’s worth.

I know it’s childish, but I still laugh internally every time I see someone coming out of Costco with what practically amounts to a palette of toilet paper. Rough Taco Tuesday life, y’all.

And if you get a hotdog at the snack stand after buying the ring, you save an additional, like, $10 on lunch.

I’m just shocked that it was a single ring. Given it’s Costco, I figured it was a box of 50 diamond rings. 

I liked them with I was kid, but they both turned into their dad: a right-winger who who drivers a lifted truck, chews tobacco, and have the sort of politics that usually ends with “...I thought this was America.” Everytime I meet their kids I think of that Maria Bamford bit about going to art class with kids names…

Next time a relative brings this up tell them you’re eagerly awaiting the first round of infidelity and divorces. Unless you like your cousins, of course. In that case, just tell prying relatives to mind their own damn business.

I get a bunch of pointed comments about how my similar-aged cousins are now all married, buying houses, and having kids and they are just SO GODDAMNED HAPPY!!! I'm fine eating my Hot Pockets and chips out of a Tupperware on my bed at 2am, thanks.