Would an armed uprising be in bad taste? ...Fuck it. Call France. We need to rent some guillotines.

The police needs to start swabbing dudes’ cheek cells asap. This is insanity.

My mind went to that Law & Order episode where it turned out that the vegetative woman’s mother paid a staff member to rape and impregnate her because the mother wanted to be a grandmother so bad.  

You don’t believe in immaculate conceptions and virgin births?

Yes. Put the facility into lockdown right away and DNA test the men. As well, per Kill Bill, start looking into friends/acquaintances of staffers. They should be able to catch the culprit pretty quick. 

That’s exactly what I thought! If she can’t say “I’m pregnant” to the staff caring for her, then she can’t consent! There’s no tip toe around this one, and I hope they DNA test the staff so they can prosecute that fucker (unless it was a visitor).

YES.

Oh my god. This immediately brought to mind the scene in Kill Bill where the hospital attendant had been assaulting her while she was in her coma and just jesus fucking christ. This poor woman.

My plan is next time she brings up her daughters bowel movements, I shall discuss the strange sputum I find in my nasal cavities each morning.  Oh wait, you mean you DON’T want to hear about bodily fluids while you eat your casserole?  

Exactly! I’ll share bath time photos with my family— but either in person via my phone or a text/email. I can’t even fathom hashtagging it so the entire world could find it.

Ugh, my brother does stuff like this all the time. Before I had kids, my mom would tell me when complained that I’d do it too when I had kids. Well, guess what? It’s been 3 months since bubs was of and NOPE! unless you are my child’s dr, I will not make you hear that crap. 

My sister in law posted videos of my nephew crying and peeing his pants last Christmas. I just don’t get it. If you want that to be a funny story you tell close family, fine. But why put that out there forever?

I have a friend who, whenever her kid is sick, posts photos of said child lying on the couch and describes her condition in detail. I, at least, would have been horribly embarrassed at any age.  The kid is in freaking grade school at this point; it’s only a matter of time before she a) finds out and flips out about…

One of my old college dorm mates had a kid last year and she literally posts full on naked pictures of her daughter on Facebook. They’re taken from behind, but it’s pretty appalling. I mean for Halloween, she shared a picture of a pumpkin painted onto her daughter’s butt. It’s enough to make me want to burn social…

For real, though!

I also wish I could convince my sister to STOP talking about the size of her daughter’s bowel movements during dinner.  But of course I can’t say anything because then I would be the one causing drama.  

Children having children.

Man, I had to unfollow this one classmate from high school, because she literally posts on Insta everyday without fail, and it got worse once her son was born. I get wanting to share a pic here and there— it’s a good way to for family far away to see how your kid is growing and looking at life— but I already feel so…

Not for nothing, but as a parent you’re supposed to be caring for, nurturing and protecting your children… not using them as props on social media to feed your own ego. Stop this.

I side-eye the absolute fuck out of people who post nude pictures of their children online. Sure, you the parent think it’s cute; it’s still a fucking nude photo, though, dumbass. If teens can get prosecuted for distributing child porn of themselves, your ass should know better than to post your unconsenting kid’s…