“Says you.”

Me too! (And we’d have a quorum for a garage band.)

If your comment was a single-party state I would inform on dissidents.

You’re right: we should all move on.

But, if I may, I’d like to spend a portion of my afternoon telling y’all The Tale of Ol’ Crooked Hillary, or: Who the F—k Cares When Everyone Already Agrees The Two-Party System Is A Sham And That She’s Nowhere Near As Bad As Trump....

#Celibritree

You put this motherf**ker on high-quality glossy stock and I’ll more than likely give you my money.

Should you desire to, you can read a full transcript of the press conference here, or watch it here.

+4 for the third paragraph

You leave synth pop out of this, heretic.

Damn, son.

I can die secure in the knowledge that I’ll never get what the appeal of Chris Berman is.

“DEVELOPING STORY”

I am authentic, but a human

“I am a human person--as you all know--and I am without question entirely organic, with the possible exception of some of my apparel.”

You can.

(Something about how Lucius’s turn to boilerplate electronic-tinged rock betrays the novelty of their earlier efforts, acknowledging that while one wouldn’t want them to ape the style of said efforts, that s**t was really good. And that “Truce” is the best song off the new album.)