....Aaaaaaand I should have at least skimmed the whole thing before commenting. (I'm still at a loss as to how people end up with melted plastic in their ovens absent malicious intent.)

My take-away is that not letting assholes into your house nips the problem in the bud.

Shit. I hope you're doing better...!

Maybe it's, y'know, a joke?

Why would you joke? THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS.

Q: What did Steph Curry's handle say to Chris Paul's ankles?
A: SSSSSSSNAP!

I pity you.

To ensure that our great nation never runs out of irony.

"I'll be your best friend...!"

Unless, for instance, you did your undergrad at USC before starting grad school at Cal...

And you could swap out "white" for "African American" and it wouldn't be any more or less accurate. Americans in general are shitty about turning out to vote; Americans in general don't really know a whole lot about MLK or the broader civil rights struggle.

You stole my intended reference, you sonofa...

If he's listening to, say, Moby, it's the same thing.

The sun: it burns us.

Frank Ocean auto-rec....engage!

Third!

That's how I do it, too!

I'm with pollyannacowgirl 2.0 on this one.

She was great in the sack! That may be the key to all of this...