after he’s signed all of the pertinent non disclosure agreements.

I think that if I had ever had to do coke WITH my mother, I probably would have gone insane, however, at 18, that woulda been an awesome birthday party. (without the mom part)

of Spike on the box. (my kid ran in the bathroom while I was having my quiet “mommy’s having a smoke break before bedtime” time and II prematurely published

I’m sorry, but FOODSTIRS? that is the best name they could come up with? it doesn’t even make me think of cake! let alone Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which is just about the only thing I can think of when I hear SMG’s name. Stake-n-Cake, now that’s a name I could get behind, especially if they put a pic

oh dear Lord, please stop these fucking idiots from making decisions about anything for anyone. seriously? he hogties PP and then says they’re terrible at their jobs? I know someone else who’s terrible at being a thinking human being, not to mention a governor.

big head, little face. it’s a tragic circumstance that people always attempt to correct with hair, glasses, beards, etc. you can’t hide it.

(You and Jennifer Aniston are texting about Brad and she send you an eggplant emoji and you write back, “lol.”)

I can’t... this makes me so sad for the human race. since when is science and history pornographic? since when is a cervix even a part of pornography? I may be outdated here, but if your porn involves the cervix, it’s pretty invasive. in any case, the kids reading this book are most likely not focusing on the mentions…

we’ll just have to see if the tabloids catch her wearing it out in public. it’s one thing to wear it in a picture right after she gets it, but quite another for her to rock it walking thru NYC.

I actually work near the military school he went to, and it’s been struggling financially for years, to the extent that they’re actually renting out some of the staff housing to people (i almost rented one of the houses.) the story is that F vonC was asked to be a donor, cuz, well, duh. and he said he would only…

I just want to say that Mike Judge is a genius and called this what, 10 years ago?

there by the grace of God go I... I am a recovering heroin addict, clean for 6 years thanks to suboxone and a loving and supportive family. I grew up middle class, got started with painkillers for chronic pain and was on and off heroin/pilss for years, as well as coke. I stole from my parents, my jobs, my friends. I…

this is wonderful...

I’m obsessed with Manchego lately. with prosciutto

African impact has volunteer programs where you can go (well, pay to go) to Africa and live and help out in nature preserves. I really really really wanted to do it, but then I got knocked up. I secretly hold it against my husband.

she has a right to have a job, but if she doesn’t want to do what her employer (in this case the US government) tells her to, then they should fire her. that’s what would happen in literally any other job in the world. her job is to grant marriage licenses based on the LEGAL REQUIREMENTS of the state and country.…

No no no, 1000 times no. he looks like the worst lay of anyone’s life. the boy has zero sex appeal to me.

in looking at pictures of Ari Emanuel (who people have said this is) sad to say he’s one of those guys who looks better with sunglasses on. in which case, I’ll just continue my Jeffrey Dean Morgan fantasy - which is that JDM has that hair and is a bit slimmer. though real life JDM ain’t bad either.

I’m thinking of Jeffrey Dean Morgan... don’t know if that’s him tho... looks kinda like him. whoever he is, he is sexo.

who is that? I’m having a brain farther. I keep thinking Javier Bardem, but it’s not him, he’s P. Cruz’s man. it’s that guy from Watchmen...