We won most of the Super Bowl, just not the end-part.

I’m a Pats fan and my sister’s husband is a life-long Falcons fan. They live in Orlando, and when we want to see family (and go to Disney and Universal of course), we usually stay at their house.

Mark Davis looks like he just saw Charlize Theron steal his concubines and truck full of breast milk.

Actually, he looks like James Franco playing Captain Morgan in Pirates of the Caribbean 7: Demon Rum.

Don’t you know? Only Democrats dodged the draft. Republicans avoided it by being rich which is totally acceptable.

Because it is a lot easier to hide behind THE TROOPS than it is to have a discussion on an uncomfortable subject.

They could’ve avoided the Browns if they’d had bone spurs in their feet.

This franchise is what you get after a Disney ride impregnates the Saints.

...and whatever shards of Indianapolis remain on Andrew Luck’s broken corpse...

Still too early to tell. They’re both good and promising QBs but Winston will throw the ball into triple coverage because he thinks it’s the quality of a leader or something and Mariota is basically Joker from Mass Effect.

Remember that scene at the end of Cast Away when Tom Hanks goes and sees his wife and she’s filling him in on all the things that have changed since he’s been gone and he wants to clarify that Nashville actually has an NFL team now, but doesn’t seem all that excited about it?

“ask the Chiefs how high picks from directional Michigan schools turn out!”

Of course, we only want you on the right side so we can then complain, “Ah, ya fahkin fayehweathah, get off the bandwagon and go back to Cow Hampsha. Goodell sucks. Go Pats!”

Accused domestic abuser and Uruk-hai chieftain Terrell Suggs is still on the roster, for God’s sake.

Drive from Kansas City to Denver, nothing in this world flatter than central and western Kansas.

It’s amazing he’s a pro-athlete... In that pic he looks like the president of a high school sci-fi club who just got pants and had his copy of Dune torn up by the jocks

“Well, I was mauled by a Jaguar, learned nothing about driving, and my Dune paperback was ruined.”

There’s a reason Indiana is the “crossroads of america” - because people drive straight the fuck through it on the way to better places.

If Luck is playing behind that line, his book club should be reading As I Lay Dying.

IS IT SOMETHING IN THE WOODER?