Does Martha spritz herself with Dewar’s? That is my take-away.

You know what I’ve heard literally every day for the past five years? Some variant of “This! This will bring him down for good!”

James Corden isn't even qualified for the job he has now so I'm not sure why he'd get this gig.

Maybe if you stopped putting so much pressure on the rooster, and realized that he’s been under a lot of stress lately, and that just because he occasionally looks at other hens on the street that he isn’t interested in cheating, alright Lindsay!?

“after months of sheltering in place and not dating.”

She should put her mask on so her hands are free to push Joe Manchin down the stairs.

Russell Wilson and Ciara cement their power couple status once again after signing a first look deal with Amazon for scripted series. [Hollywood Reporter]

To be fair, her strategy was more effective than mine which was to tape my Twitter to all the headstones at local cemeteries with the tagline “Sucks you’re dead. You’re missing my tweets.” I got some backlash.

This whole thing was kicked off by extremist Haredi marching through Palestinian neighborhoods, attacking their inhabitants, and screaming “DEATH TO ARABS”, all while under the protection of the IDF.

Oh god, this old trope: Dare to criticize anything Israel does and get called an anti-Semite for it. And the whataboutism... 

Here’s to hoping that that rage channels itself toward a massive coronary, sooner rather than later.

Hopefully he just rages himself to a stroke.

Their kid was the problem. They should have had IT euthanized. 

It’s just so dumb. This personal reference that Tina Fey made in her own fucking memoir made ME feel sad about MYSELF for reasons ergo Tina Fey sucks.

These people suck, who cares about all these what ifs and whatabouts. We know exactly what they did.

No bad dogs, only bad owners.

Sounds about right. God forbid Jen spend 2.5 seconds not dating, engaged or linked to a man. We’d all think she was lonely pathetic spinster! I find it fascinating that her brand is basically the exact opposite of Tracee Ellis Ross’ who was never married and rarely ever publicly linked to anyone and is pretty much…

As a fat person, or as someone else said, a “Grade A American Suburban Livestock-sized human”, I have to say I hate any tightly-packed restaurant space. Banquettes are no more difficult than any other crowded situation where I have to be careful about how far I push out my chair or hold my coat until I’m out on the…