Well, the good news is that no one will be disappointed (except maybe whoever invested money in this mess), because absolutely no one was asking for this movie.

Guys, my brother arrived from Chicago on Saturday and he’s not leaving until a week into the new year and I am already ready to smother him with the air mattress that is taking up half our living room. Three god damn weeks isn’t a visit, it’s homesteading. He said it was the cheapest airfares he could find, but I’m…

It’s an extremely tired reference to his small role in Office Space. It comes up whenever Orlando Jones is mentioned and it’s wildly inappropriate here, IMO. 

Jones didn’t just stumble into acting last week, so when he says he knows the difference between not having his option picked up (what Freemantle is claiming happened) and being straight-up fired (what Jones says happened), I have no reason not to think he knows what he’s talking about.

Last night’s episode was the point where I just sighed and started counting down the days to Avenue 5, because this show is not doing it for me.

Ah yes, the fine state of Iowa, one of the first to secede from the Union. What, what?

I always thought Luminiferous Ether sounded like a lost Joy Division album.

I’m currently listening to Catch and Kill on audio and have Harvey Weinstein on the brain (gross, but better than having him on any physical part of my body). Apparently the toxic relationship he and Paltrow had—she’s never said he assaulted her, but that he was very controlling and bullying—is the main reason she…

That was the Lost Generation. Surprised they had time to invent sliced bread between fighting WWI, writing novels, and fending off F. Scott Fitzgerald’s drunken advances.

I set myself a goal of reading 100 books this year, and I met it in October; granted, some of them were short books, and there were a couple of kid’s lit re-reads (anyone else remember Jennifer, Hecate, Macbeth, William McKinley, and Me, Elizabeth?). Because I was keeping track, and because there was a page weirdly…

I read Violet a few months ago and thought it was 99% slow burn and a really abrupt ending, but I did enjoy that slow burn. I’ll get around to Kill Creek some time in 2020, I’m sure.

I mean everything else that’s dumb about this aside, Manson wasn’t convicted of any federal crimes in the murders—which is kind of ironic, because he committed federal crimes almost exclusively prior to his final release in 1967. It’s why he spent so much of his life in institutions.

My main takeaway from this is that Conan O’Brien is going to get pranked into watching that Mac & Me clip again.

Between my social anxiety and my crushing medical debt, I’m not big on live shows, so the best live show I saw in 2019 was also the only one I saw in 2019, the comedy/true crime podcast True Crime Obsessed, when they came to New Orleans for Crime Con. Worth it!

Pour one out for Mysteries Abound, which abruptly ceased production a couple of months ago. It was an old-ish Australian man who read internet articles about weird stuff (cryptids, unsolved murders, the occasional creepypasta) and apparently some people found it really soothing. Me, I’ve tried (that podcast and others)…

I’ll subscribe if Toby Huss is coming back to play Big Mike. *singing and strumming guitar* “And the cops bought a Nazi flag tooodaaaaay.... I got $3! We can buy a poodle!!”

Was this the fight with Space Hitler where Jones’ dad paid everyone off? Or did Jones regularly get his ass beat in parking lots back in the 1990s??

Jones apparently claimed he’d “intentionally fired the gun as a joke.”

Oh, thanks for reminding me that Making It is back! Looks like I got something to mini-binge this weekend. When I saw the first season I thought “there really IS a reality show for everyone”. Although I have to admit: I never watch the end, where they cut whoever didn’t make it. I just find out when I watch the…

I think it’s because of that, which is why I said so, bless your heart. Try eating some fruit, you seem constipated. And I’m going to dismiss you, because you’re kind of an asshole. Bye, talk to you never!