Everyday I thank God for my small boobs, as they allow me to stand next to whomever I please.

Do you ever just read stuff like this and think “we as a species really deserve to be hit by a meteor”?

My mother once told me that I had been the ugliest baby she had ever seen. Then she paused a bit and went ‘You look fine now though’.

Selma Blair got Botwined for me right out of the gate. She was too good at playing the character in Cruel Intentions (and I was long convinced that character was meant to be mentally disabled) and I cannot look at her and see someone of normal intelligence, so every role since has been ruined.

Thank goodness humans don’t have to lick their babies clean like cats.

It’s the waxy coating: they’re little cheesy creatures that are blue, shriveled and slug-like. They don’t get cute for a few months at least and even then...

omg newborn babies are disgusting.

why I gotta pay for my abortion when your insurance pays for dick meds tho

This is the exact reason GGers will stay the hell away from her.

Why does GG need to do anything against good people in power to get their attention? I wish they’d just slam down on the shitheads for all the bs they’ve already pulled like threatening women for voicing their opinions.

I feel like a horrible person for saying this, but I pray GamerGate actually tries to pull something on Senator McCaskill. They’ve been going after journalists and game devs and people with no real power to effect consequences for so long, let’s see what happens when they target someone who actually does have the…

* their

How many stars do I need to get a free coffee?

It’s fucking blue and black! Do not start with that shit again.

How will anyone know about Jesus without Christmas throwing up on everything?

That’s right — Starbucks hates Jesus. That’s why their cups are red — for Satan.

I liked the design. It looks like Christmas without Christmas throwing up on it. It's simple. What's wrong with simple?

As an Anglican, I'm pretty fucking angry it isn't purple. Let's put Christ back into the Advent penitential season, people.

As someone who has read multiple biographies of Zelda, Scott was a terrible fucking person. None of his books contain sympathetic characters, likely because he was such a narcissistic asshole.

Because when at least two of the guests wind up dead they are hoping it will be chalked up to thematic consistency.