Who could stand to be around drunk college kids for a week?

I'm pretty sure that's what Dante described in the third level of hell.

Huge shoutout to Gawker Media's undersung graphics geniuses Jim Cooke and Sam Woolley for laboring over that map. They're both amazing, glorious people and I'd probably be dead without them.

I can't be the only one who saw the headline and thought ...

This is not about Doctor Who.

I know there's no proof that my wardrobe is a gateway to Narnia. But I've seen some anecdotal evidence that says otherwise.

Caffeine is what makes me have even a little. I don't think I could physically leave the house without it.

How the fuck did Champagne beat Vodka?! SOMEONE WAS PAID OFF. I DEMAND A RECOUNT.

Caffeine it is, that substance that brings you back to life every morning and keeps you productive during the day.

"Once upon a time, there was a lovely little sausage called Baldrick. And it lived happily ever after. The end."

Personally, I prefer to find my enlightenment at the bottom of a bucket of Ben and Jerry ice cream liberally sprinkled with cognac.

Fucking idiots. Everyone from St. Louis knows that rules aren't supposed to be written.

I fully admit to being addicted to this damn game and I hate myself for it. But I have never ever paid for that shit. Don't blame this on me.

LATE CONTENDER

I am 1/3 of the way through my final student teaching assignment. This one is FROM HELL!!

Lonely places without the love of a good pizza.

...what sex life?

Oh baby.... want to sit here next to me and talk about longitudinal epidemiological selection biases?

Okay, so, I did kind of have a crush on Miles.

Sorry, Richard (#23) should be #1, because...

At some point it'd be really neat if Sophia Coppola decided to make a movie that wasn't all about how tough it is to be a princess.