WHAT KIND OF PET OWNERS LET THEIR PRECIOUS CAT GET THAT CLOSE TO A FUCKING ALLIGATOR? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING??!!!

Laura, I gotta ask - why did you write this article if you have never seen the movies or read the books? Is there no one at Jezebel who could have actually given an informed opinion?

I hate winter so much. I want to collect all the kitty babes and keep them safe. AND GODDAMN IT I HATE WINTER.

My heart stopped after the cat jumped and disappeared. I'm glad the end footage shows the cat appearing alright and sauntering around like normal.

I do this to photos of buildings all the time, and can see the same logic applied with people. We'll edit out a powerline that gets in the way of the shot, because yes the power line exists but it's really not the point or part of the story we're trying to tell, and it distracts people. We'll photoshop out a bit of…

Thanks so much everyone!! I'm still finding all the places my work has been posted, and I'm proud to be featured here! :D

Every even part-Siamese I've ever owned—and there've been a few over the decades—was hugely talkie and they've all had a distinctive drawling yowl they employed on necessary occasions (like the food dish being only half-full, or there being some catnip left in the jar and they knew it, or me not petting them enough,…

My 16lb orange tabby would beg to differ, but he's too busy making my legs go numb.

Lily doesn't even restrain herself that much. She looks like your typical house panther, but she has the Siamese body and the Siamese voice and she just walks around the whole goddamn house meowing like she has a film crew behind her. She's doing it now, at the bookcases. I suspect she's tossed a toy under the sofa…

So pretty! Um, and as an owner of a half-Siamese who doesn't take after her momma at all in appearance but in most ways in terms of personality, let me say that if you adopt a Siamese cat, you will never come home to a lonely quiet house. In fact, you may never have a quiet house again.

There's a great organization in Philly called City Kitties that actively goes out to rescue strays in West Philadelphia and also organizes fosters for their strays while they get them well. They also had a Grump Cat "look-similar" recently. Here's Green Bean.

This makes me feel better, actually. The Thetans made her kiss Ed! She'll be fine after a good audit...

Consider yourself lucky - when I was a kid our cat ate tinsel and pooped tinsel trains for days.

…and speaking of asshole pets during the holidays… my dog eats everything- including a Duraflame log. (FYI: it's not toxic.) Wait- she doesn't eat everything: she doesn't like green beans. When I give her mixed vegetables with her dinner, she will PICK OUT the green beans and leave them on the floor. She has also…

They should have done this to the cat:

Except for Kim Kardashian, who is a hobbit.

I'm Jewish, have never celebrated Christmas, and I know all the words to carols because I'm a hearing adult who lives in America.

Hugh Jackman +
cute animals = SQUEE!

Taystee and Poussey, the answer is YOU! We are rooting for YOU!