Not horrible exactly. Just weird.

Not ALL Women! Wait, what?

That's what I don't get. Did they get bad intel regarding the factions of the US pizza wars?

I am not going to take a side on the Dunks vs Tims debate because I am a Masshole married to a Canadian but I really need someone to explain to me the existence of Boston Pizza. Boston is known for many things. Funny accents, baked beans, sports teams, drunk college kids... Pizza is most certainly not one of them.

My door would be so much happier if Floyd had a wheel.

Oh and if we are doing ring bearers too... At three my son was in my sister's beach wedding which also featured her two dogs. Despite being a relatively short ceremony he still managed to work in time to dig a very large hole for him and his cousin to sit in and to make out with one of my sister's very large…

My two-year-old flower girl was not bad just... very precise. She thought she needed to set each petal down individually. After it took her a full minute to move one foot, someone explained to her that she was supposed to throw them so she dumped the whole basket and charged up the aisle to her mom.

If you are a special kind of nerd, there's always these:

Growing up we had rabbits. One particular genius refused to chew. My mother had to clip its fangs with dog toenail clippers so it didn't starve to death.

Once I called 911 because there was a person directly outside my building going to town on a van with a baseball bat. The dispatcher was like, "Is it your van? No? OK, then." and just completely checked out on me after that.

My kids inexplicably hate all Muppets but they adore Futurama so I am willing to overlook some things.

Meh, six year olds are not known for their good taste.

I tried pointing out to my kids that Q does a voice on My Little Pony, playing kind of the same character even, and they were NOT IMPRESSED.

This is way, way better than being proposed to at a lawyer's office after your boyfriend fucks up his work visa paperwork.

I have seen that commercial, what, a kajillion times? I just noticed it yesterday and it made me happy because I know having a campaign like that is a huge deal to a commercial actor.

No fair! We had no Clue Crew members in Chicago this year.

A goodly portion of my toys including my Star Wars and He-Man got tossed after a fire in my grandparents' attic. Of course the stupid Barbies survived.

I want to see an online bitch off between the Allure Beauty Box ladies and the moms on Facebook trying to buy Frozen merch.

God I miss the Big E. And I have definitely eaten fried Kool Aid there as well.