If he doesn't drill Aybar right now I do not know what I will do.

I am pretty sure my tv just went dark and then there was a voice that said "FINISH HIM!".

No wonder DUAN is so emrty these days. It's a giant fuckin' pity party.

@Lizabelle: No, I NEED this. I am ambivalent towards the Pats, despise the NBA, went to a wmonen's college and haven't had a hockey team since the Whale left Hartford and the Indians left Springfield.

@Pete Gaines: Baseball FAIL weeps gently into beer

@Jerkwheat: Did it look like he had marbles under his skin? That has happened to my dog a few times and now he needs a special diet and has to take steroids for severe allergies. So, uh, I hope yours doesn't have that.

There are not enough cat pictures with poorly spelled captions in the world to make me feel better about this game.

@StevePerryPsychOut: He needs to learn to take himself out. And also fetch beer.

@Kid Canada: I spent 10 days in ON listening to my in-laws bitch about it and watching Harper and his creepy ham lips in commercials every five minutes.

@Lizabelle: I suppose I have it much better here in Chicago since everyone is still too bitter to want to talk about baseball.

@TheDerridaDrop: If there's anything I do well, it's wishing ill will to people I sincerely dislike.

@Lizabelle: Agreed, I am thinking that drinking really is the answer. At least I will have a good reason to be sick at work tomorrow.

@I Party With Smoot: I'd say you should go to the premiere of the next Date Movie, Disaster Movie etc and start handing out throat punches to the people standing in line to get in. That should clear up the TBS ratings pretty quickly.

@TheDerridaDrop: aaaaand my mom now knows what she is getting me for Christmas.

@UkraineNotWeak aka Praying for a Bullpen: Imagine how the dog feels.

I really feel like I should be drinking but if this gets much worse I will just end up crying into my glass, surrounded by animals dressed in Red Sox clothing.

@G Voll the Mole: Well I clearly enjoy punishing myself since I am watching the fat people show between innings. DUAN is just another outlet for my self loathing.

This game sucks so much as I turned to DUAN for comfort.

@LindsayC: Don't feel bad. Last week it took me until 7 pm to realize I was wearing my underpants inside out. Fortunately, the next day I caught myself right after I put them (new pair obvs) on backwards.

@LindsayC: Or Tuesday, whichever :).