I want that on my Diva Cup.

Remember kids: Black Lives Matter is a bunch of whiners who are looking for reasons to be offended. The real oppression is a lack of Christmas iconography on your coffee cups.

I don’t know. They may have a point. Those cups don’t look anything like the ones Jesus drank his Gingerbread Lattes out of.

Dear Melissa McCarthy:

Man, it really is like a different universe for rich people, eh?

I would have thought Colonel Sanders would be a breast man.

HAHAHA I could totally see that. So dumb but so pretty.

Haha did he let her touch his hair?

Fancy pjs are a level of dress-up that I could tolerate.

This is great! When I die, I’ll probably do a similar thing with my fortune to prevent my heirs from getting it.

Sure. She COULD have done that. But ballers gonna ball.

Say what you will about Lady Gaga, but that looks comfortable as fuck.

Mine would too. You could make it work by painting a flower or sunshine on your belly though!

This is, hands down, the single best article so far on FlyGirl. It’s interesting, funny, and well written without falling into the white girl reaching enlightenment via fucking locals in the developing world trope that the majority of stuff on here does. Well done!

But they would go with that jumpsuit so well!

Also, “making love” is maybe my least favorite term for sex. It is 1000000% not what is happening when I am involved, as much as I love my boyfriend.

When I was younger, I very earnestly explained to my little friends that a blow job was when you licked the neck of the person you liked and blew air on it so it got that cold, tingly feeling.