Es posible? I’ve probably doxxed myself a few times here, oops :/

I didn’t stay long enough to notice. The other high school friend wedding I went to in my hometown was kegs and fried chicken and we we were like 18.

I think it was in a community center in our hometown. Well, the reception at least. Us heathens weren’t allowed at the ceremony. My friend and I smoked cigarettes outside for what we deemed an acceptable amount of time and then peaced out. 19-year-old rebels!

PBR: The Romance Maker

I once ditched a boring ass Mormon wedding and drove 2 hours to a punk rock show bc I wanted to bang the guitarist. I did, in fact, bang him. And 10 years later I married the drummer.

A murderous rage could very well be prompted by extended PMS? Or it could just make you eat a lot of ice cream, idk.

Her hair during that era is my everlasting inspiration. This wig is blasphemous!

I see a woman crying, too. But, uh, is she crying blood? I think I know what this ink blot test says about me.

Oh Ryan, that hat...

Hell naw. I live in a region that lives off daytime wine drinking. And its wine, so ya know, classy. Viva la afternoon buzz!

I’m pretty sure his character on Trophy Wife was the first time I ever liked a child character on a tv show. He was hilarious and that show was seriously underrated.

I had the same affect on my husband. We will both grab stray carts and take them up to a store when we are going in, and then also put strays in the corral when leaving. It might be a bit much? But I worked service industry for over a decade and shit’s not that hard, people.

Well, Coffee won in the Drugs vs Alcohol March Madness, so I think Ordering In and Not Being Here to Make Friends are both indicative of the crew we have going here. These are both things that I am personally very good at.

Arg. I can’t deal with the word “Balancing” being slapped across such a crooked stance. She’s not even holding anything that would necessitate being askew to balance. I’m sure that was a purposeful ☆~design decision~☆ but they’re trolling us right? Is that supposed to be cute/relatable? My shoulders look kinda like…

Her boyfriend played a music venue I worked at and she was super sweet to everyone. Also, she tipped her server 40 bucks for a free cup of coffee, so I’m a fan.

Eek! Science!

Damn the older I get, the more surprises my body throws at me. My allergies are instantly in my mouth/throat so my poor abused stomach lining isn’t to blame yet. I have zero theories for how they developed, but ordering a smoothie is a bitch.

I simply refused to vote Ordering In vs Sleeping with your Coworkers. As someone with over a decade in the service industry, there is no reality without both.