Ripley will simply have to pick up the shattered pieces of her life and move on. I know that I have.

Twenty years later, SamBarge proudly asserts that she’s never seen that movie and had no idea who the writer was talking about. (Jack Dawson?! Who the fuck is Jack Dawson? Isn’t that Michael Shannon? “Fit on a door”? What the fuck are you talking about?)

And, don’t forget, her suffering will bring her closer to God. As will the prayers of the faithful. Apparently. Assuming any of the shit is true, which it is not.

Q is still on.

Plus, regardless of how angry she is at the airline, she looks like she’s being nice and polite to the passengers around her.

I agree. Of course, in addition to hating him, I do hate Woody Allen’s films but that’s just a happy coincidence. Some times it works out like that.

I’m guessing we’ll have to stand in line. I’ll bring a tent and camp chairs. We may as well be comfortable.

You don’t sound like an asshole. You’re just saying something utterly mundane. Of course people react differently to the deaths of people they feel connected to.

Is that what’s depressing? Really?

People notice and mourn the deaths of people they know and have an emotional connection to rather than the deaths of people they don’t know and never hear about.

This month can end. What the hell? That’s enough loss for one month, surely.

Actually, restricting access to people for an irrational reason like “my imaginary friend doesn’t like you having sex without babies” is different from “my bottom line doesn’t allow the more expensive forms of prescription BC.”

Well, people have a problem fundamentalists dictating the birth control options of their employees. You don't. Personally, I'm less worried about local ordinances than I am about Supreme Court decisions that limit women's reproductive health options but whatever. You do you.

Steve Earle’s got you covered:

Costco is the anti-Walmart. Good pay and benefits and no god-bothering of the employees.

Luke survived a dog fight that claimed the lives of many more experienced x-wing fighters before he fired one shot. A more experienced x-wing fighter fired a shot before Luke and missed. Luke used the force to guide his shot into the exhaust port and destroy the Death Star.

Or “cue” as in an actor’s cue, but yeah, no ‘que’.

My comment only judged (1) workplaces that force women to wear make up and (2) my inability to manage my money.

What’s dickish? Where I said that I don’t wear make up and it’s a good thing because I don’t manage my money well enough to afford it?

That’s exactly what I was going to say. The most surprising thing about this story is that Blake Shelton has a hairdresser, full stop.