How come women can’t go sleeveless when Paul Ryan is allowed to go spineless?

Well of course he didn’t hire you. He didn’t want you to bone his wife.

Well, no, West would not be better than the worst NBA guard today. He’s like 80 years old.

Every second you watch your little “marble race” could be spent reading the works of Dostoevsky and even the great Shakespeare. I won’t be joining you on this fool’s errand. Good day.

“although Kerr (coach version) probably tries to get creative and get Kerr or Longley switched onto Curry.”

The kids call him “G-d Shammg-d.”

a triple-double from Matt Barnes

Jose Bautista is goddamned delightful and is part of what makes baseball fun to watch. I feel sorry for these unwritten rules clutching sandbags that can’t see that.

There once was a team from Miami

You did not read what I wrote.

Cue all the imbeciles who won’t get the joke in the headline. I’ve already fallen for this shit. Put another W in the win column for the Warriors. Winning 112-95 against the Lakers still counts as a win Deadspin!

The 2014-2015 Feeling Yourself Award previously belonged to 16 year old sophomore Aiden Miller-Stoughton, who swears he was just cleaning his room.

Sorry. I appreciate what CM does as a player as well as Eichel, but you really don’t know a thing about Buffalo. The most Buffalo thing to ever happen was the decline of America’s manufacturing base between 1950 and 2000.

Translated from the Russian: And of course, Steph Curry hits the long range 3 for the win. An inevitability just like the slow creeping onset of winter, crushing the joy from the people and reminding us all of the impending nature of our own deaths. You can see it on the Thunder players’ faces. You might think from…

You mean in that it is self-referential, masturbatory, more or less useless, and divorced from the thesis of the article?

Lies. JJ Redick is the quintessence of the fuckboy. I could no more imagine a sunnier sun.

Keeper Thinks He’s Ronaldinho Or Some Shit

We’ve seen professional dunker Jordan Kilganon around these parts before, and he has now upped his dunk game to the point that he can pull off ridiculous jams while wearing jeans.

Having Timmy on the ticket could shore up Popovich’s campaign with the big fundamentalist voting bloc.

Luckily, Olsen’s wife will never see this.