Wearing the mask is a good start, but if Cesc really wants to get away with it, perhaps he shouldn’t have worn a shirt with his name on the back.

The most impressive part is his decision to scratch his nose midway through.

Nice try, Brandon.

“Oh right, Marshawn Lynch”

I tried pouring out some of my 40 for these guys, but Maurice Clarett caught it in his mouth before it hit the ground.

NFL Players: [Can’t remember anything]

Mouton also tells a similar story of when he sacked Tom Brady, and Brady told him he would, “Knock the wind out of him.”

That was Neymar’s Venezuelan cousin, Lumbar.

a soccer hating commentor who goes to a soccer article just to post a stupid remark about soccer? Woah. Idiot.

The Washington Capitals have a long and glorious history of choking like 80 year-old cloister Nuns at their first NBA locker-room blowjob festival. I would be very pleased to see them defeat the Rangers but there is a better chance of Scarlet Johansson showing up at my door dressed like a Parisienne hooker begging for…

Blowing a late lead in game 5 and then falling behind & rallying furiously (albeit not furiously enough) in game 6 is just so very Caps. I can’t wait to see how they manage to kick away the chance to advance in game 7; I just don’t know whether it will the fault of one critical mistake, an epic Lundquist performance,…

You could say he was the Ultimate Warrior.

I prefer to get my cats by scraping them off my tires.

Get a cat from somewhere.

Sooo...Bayern players were slipping in Lewy’s blood during the penalties?

My dog once at a knee high panty hoe. Well, he did it twice. but the first time stands out.

[scrums]

“though conspiracy theorists will note the Rangers-colored markers”

I could imagine Harbaughs wife is a lot like the wife of Dale’s brother in “Step Brothers.” Like if somebody punched Harbaugh in the face, she would get excited.

Van Pelt is better than ESPN deserves. Stewart Scott was in that category too.