Yeah, where I come from, this is called “poisoning” and it has a heftier punishment. As it should.

My dad did this. He took an already traumatized kid and showed him the Twilight Zone episode with Shatner. I haven’t been able to fly calmly since.

You must be a blast at parties...

I just handled raw chicken. Apparently, if you don’t stick your hands on your mouth multiple times while doing so, there’s nothing to fear.

I make my own pizza more often than I dine out. It’s a modified Alton Brown recipe (which sums up most of my recipes). The only bit I’m not making from scratch is the mozzarella. And that’s just a matter of time. Anyhoo, there’s something fun about shaping the dough and layering on the toppings and sliding it off the…

But that means going to Reddit...

I’ve spoken with some dudes who were ghosted and it was readily clear why they were ghosted: they had dangerous levels of rage toward women. Sometimes ghosting is the only safe option.

In my experience, rotisserie chickens make weak stock (all the gelatin has already been extracted by the slow roast). Also, I don’t add spices to my stock because I use it for many things and I don’t want to give it much of a flavor profile just yet. I just save roasted chicken bones (especially backbones) and the…

How do you deal with a housemate with an addiction to throwing things away, to the point where the only reason they will acquire a particular object is to get rid of it later? Because that’s my problem. This person wants me to throw away a LOT of perfectly useful stuff. And has thrown away things when I wasn’t around,…

Back in the day, companies would mail people vacuum cleaners and other appliances, and then try to extort payment. A law was passed to make anything you get in the mail your property. Put an end to that shady practice.

Strange how my parents could keep me under control without physical violence.

No accounting for a parent who isn’t as good at cooking as they think they are?

Who the hell thinks a stove is a safe thing to lean on? That thing makes FIRE.

Boston - Boston: THE ENTIRE FRIKKEN ALBUM.

I like Alton Brown’s Pork Wellington recipe. Cut a pork t-loin in half lengthwise, and stuff. He uses dried apples, I use dried mushrooms. Wrap in prosciutto. Wrap THAT in a rolled out puff pastry sheet (schmear some mustard in it but leave the closing flap mustard free). Seal with egg wash, paint the entire thing…

Welding gloves. Potholders are for losers and mitts are for baseball.

My mom used to pour out the oil, because she thought it was unhealthy. So we’d have this jar (or bucket) of peanut butter about as spreadable as rubber cement.

There had to be a decent Subreddit eventually. I mean, Law of Averages.

If the Pats are the biggest “bad guys” in your life, you have an easy life. And too much investment in sportsball.

Porn sites keep saying “Share this via Facebook or Google+” and I’m all “dammit, I don’t want anyone to know I have Google+!”