Fun fact about this Bear: Her name is Nora, her mother rejected her when she was born at the Columbus Zoo (now lives at the Oregon Zoo) so the zoo had to step in and hand-rear her as a baby polar cub. This had only been done a handful of times, with very little success, so it’s a small miracle she’s alive and healthy…

Seriously at this point how the fuck is this real life. It’s too much to absorb. Like my new reality has shifted too quickly and I can’t fucking handle it. If I had the money I seriously would just go and herd cows at this point. The world has gone fucking mad.

No.

The culprits:

I don’t think someone laughing at you for the fact you attend Arizona State really qualifies as a racial slur.

I was starting to feel old because I’m older than the majority of NFL players. I am not prepared to be older than the coaches.

Rams broadcast

God...I haven’t been this concerned since Hootie left the Blowfish.

Is the guy fucking one of the letters from the Nazi SS logo?

I can think of another new symbol that more accurately gauges fan interest

WELL, PISTOLS AT DAWN.

Oh? Phillip Rivers threw 21 fucking interceptions this year. 21!

This whole thing is so goddamn stupid.

Russian traditions seem to be by brutes for brutes

When a powerful U.S. Senator is delivering copies of Pizzagate conspiracy theory manifestos to the director of the FBI, this equivalence will become valid.

Well, with all the injuries he’s had, he’s certainly not running away from basketball.

Reminds me of that time at work when I got fired for calling my co-worker a dirty fucking whore. When she complained, my boss had me thrown out the door. I tried to explain as the door slammed shut. “But my wife...”

I just wish Ashley Feinberg posted more often :(

Chris Berman: [flashes wallet]