Rather than hibernating for a year or so in shame over how colossally the U.S. botched the World Cup qualification process—and rather than undergoing a sober and ruthless accounting of the specific ways the entire soccer system in America failed, and coming up with a strategy for how to fix these flaws—U.S. Soccer and…

Hell, I consider myself a pretty serious football fan, but I have zero interest in US Soccer, the USMNT, or MLS. I have a job and a pathetic semblance of a life, but how much football can you watch a week? Just keeping up with the top Euro leagues is a full time job practically, why waste my time watching shit…

USMNT had a chance to pivot after dumping Klinsmann. When they took the ostensibly safe play by hiring Arena, I was fairly certain that it would result in this sort of calamitous end. It was either this, or go to the World Cup and let themselves be utterly humiliated on an even bigger and brighter stage (see: 1998).

I tried that move in a freshmen “B - team” practice and shorted that bounce so the defender took it square under the sack. Poor dude had to go to the hospital because his testicle was “inside” him and had to be pullled out.

Han Solo is gonna fuck him up when he hears what Sepp did to his daughter.

Party schools should be weighted according to how remote they are from legitimate large cities, the average cost of bulk beer, the available alternatives to simple intoxication, and how many students are hired by prestige firms upon graduation. Essentially,(asshole of nowhere+$30 kegs+non-competitive D-3 school with…

If I know my history, there’ll be statues of the loser of the Civil Conflict trophy up all over the south in a few years.

I don’t think anyone’s trying to litigate a future civil prosecution, pal. The point is there is no world in which punching that woman in the face was the appropriate response to the circumstances. You’ve got eyes, come on.

Wait, you were being serious?

Start Me Up -The Rolling Stones

We just need to follow the leads of the Australians.

Update: He has already thrown an interception in the game, which will be played Sunday at 1:00pm EST.

My take was:

But can they do it on a rainy night in-ah, you know what, close enough.

I’ve heard people trying to defend McNair’s remarks as “something that people say all the time.” The thing is, I’ve never heard “inmates running the prison.” It’s always been “inmates running the asylum,” as in bat-shit psychotic patients attempting to run their psychiatric hospital. That being the case, his use of…

Bíttolo actually only needed two stitches but the doctor didn’t want to embarrass him.

I was stuck in a lobby about a week ago. They had a TV turned to ESPN. Now, I don’t watch ESPN, like, at all, but hey, at least it wasn’t turned to one of the 24/7 News Yelling Networks, so I paid attention. Screamin’ A was on with a couple of other dudes. I think one was that weaselly ESPN boxing analyst (the one who…

Groceries, and things of that nature

I wonder if at some point he just starts shouting when he reads grocery lists aloud, too. “Eggs, Wheaties, apples, orange juice, milk, POWERADE! SEVENTH GENERATION! LIGHT BULBS! CAMPBELL’S SOUP! A NICE PIECE OF SALMON! canned tomatoes, soy sauce, spaghetti, butter.”