Read that as ‘Make your husband and the kids watch,” and thought you went to a fairly dark place.

So fucking stupid. Don’t waste your time finding a nanny your husband won’t want to fuck. If he is so inclined there are a dozen other ways for him to cheat. Find a nanny you want to fuck.

I don’t need an aphrodisiac. I need someone to have sex with. That would be great.

It was a pretty nice dick, tbh. But I like looking at penises.

He’s exceedingly good-looking, but why is he wearing my Aunt Melba’s good Sunday coat?

Is there a term for the opposite of lame duck? “Soarin Eagle” perhaps?

“She didn’t want Lilly to learn about black history,” he said, “She just wanted her to learn about the Confederacy.”

But my experience in this world has been that the people who believe themselves to be white are obsessed with the politics of personal exoneration. And the word racist, to them, conjures, if not a tobacco-spitting oaf, then something just as fantastic— an orc, troll, or gorgon. “I’m not a racist,” an entertainer once…

I came here hoping someone would be talking about the classism from this episode, how Caitlyn said that young trans people are not working because they get more money from social programs. This. This is what you chose to highlight??????? Hopefully there’s someone with more than a fluff piece in the morning.

And KYLIE. omg I am so scared for her.

“You’re way hot! Why’d you cut your hair? Now you’re not as fuckable to me! Omg sheesh take it as a compliment.”

I’m going to give him a pass, because you just can’t hate on a 20+ year crush, but is the Downey tweet a little uncharacteristically douche-y? Intentional?

And that deference had NO connection to that fact that you were her mother’s man and the father of her siblings for 10 years prior, right?

“She responded to someone paternal.”

Like, whatever I guess, they’ve been married for 20 years and obviously this dynamic works for them. It makes me knee-jerk grossed out to read these comments now, but there are a million kinks and relationship types and preferences I will never understand, nor do I need to.

I was happy to give her an enormous amount of decision making just as a gift

So he’s where the phrase “who’s your daddy” during sex came from? (I will see myself out)

TL;DR

The Gawker open office plan looks like my version of hell. I say this from behind the closed door of my space heater warmed office while listening to Fleet Foxes at full volume.

rich people problem