She’s completely on-brand, what’s the problem?

Did anyone else think Mike Day looked a little too good in the home makeover sketch for the joke to land as well as it should have?

Thank you, glad I’m not the only one who was confused there.  And now I’m a little sad that Farley isn’t around to do the role.

I've had to look 3 times to make sure that isn't Chris Farley

Thank you for this, I have spent all morning looking for a website to tell me who won last night’s game.

Yes, but it also plays into his “most attacked president in history” narrative and by Wednesday, he’ll be saying it was just a small group Democratic representatives and he heard they had paid some people off to boo him. Probably illegal immigrants taking those booing jobs away from real Americans who love him, but…

The best thing about this is that it will eat away at him way, way, way more than things like “credibly accused of being a Russian asset” or “revealed almost daily, often by his own idiotic admission, to have participated in criminal activity.”

They were clearly saying boo-urns.

God, I hope that "lock him up" chant burned its way into his insecure little facsimile of a soul and we get a torrent of rage tweets about it tomorrow. HOOK IT TO MY VEINS!

Agreed that using the fact that you satisfied the urge to procreate, something we are all genetically programmed to do, as evidence that you couldn’t have been misogynistic is ridiculous.

PLEASE INFORM SOMEONE TO TURN OFF THE DAMN AUTOPLAYING VIDEOS

So chickenshit of Nagy to not try to advance the ball with 40 seconds left. That way he could blame it on the kicker and cover his ass. 

If it was anyone other than the Bears, it would be a non-story. Since it is the Bears, it’s the equivalent of Friday the 13th Part C, with a missed FG rising up from the dead to terrorize Nagy yet again. If only there was some way for a Bears fan to dress as the double doink for Halloween.

Counter:  Missed go-ahead kicks in the final seconds of games are indeed the reason why games are lost.  Because you see, if the kick had been made, they’d have won.

The only thing that a man has to put in to be a father is about a teaspoon’s worth of work. Past that, the bar is pretty much set so low that “not abandoning your family” would cover the rest.

Ghouliani is the gift that keeps on giving.

My personal favorite, from back when all this naming-rights foolishness started, was the Poulan Weed-Eater Independence Bowl

The infuriating thing to me is how this piece is both narrowly focused a single baseball team’s operations and yet also very much describes EVERYTHING about America-circa-2019.

MLB instructed the home team to wear alternate jerseys so the president is the only obvious white national in the stadium.

Related: I don’t mind Joe Buck, either. He is extremely okay at a job that must be harder than it appears from the comfort of my couch judging by how many other people are awful at it. But is he really the only one who can do this? We’ve got him flying from Houston for Game 2, to Minnesota for Thursday Night Football,…