Honestly now is the best time for this guy’s long-awaited comeback. With more and more regulations getting eradicated by the new administration in the White House, Tiger can finally get surgery to replace most of his bones with golf clubs. In a lot of ways, burdensome bone regulations are the thing that has been…

My favorite verse in the Bible is the one where Jesus says to his followers:

Hope is poison.

If I hit myself in the head hard enough with this comically large dildo, perhaps I will lose consciousness until the playoffs.

I HAVE BEEN OWNED ONLINE

i would be shocked if one of the best athletes on the planet who is also above 6 feet tall could not dunk this is stupid you are all being stupid i hate you please write more of these things

I think that’s fair. I actually really like Jimmy. I think it’s insane how much he’s been able to elevate his offensive game. Truly. I’d definitely put him in the hallowed elite category for two way wings for sure. I think Kawahi Leonard has an edge on him. Durant. So yeah he’s a top 3-5 guy at his position…

FUCK

this is fair. i apologize.

This Bulls season has played out precisely how it was always going to play out. An overwhelmingly mediocre team led by Jimmy Butler, whose consistent growth into a viable go-to guy is outstripped and overshadowed by his complete inability to connect on a real level with any of his teammates or “lead” for more than a…

I love your comment so very much. Thank you.

i will stay on brand

the adverb ‘happily’ is doing a tremendous amount of work there

wow he will play catch with his kids he must really love that shit

damn the board of directors are gonna have my ass for this!

this is a bad take.

He has the support of the pizza villain. We cannot stop him.

Thank you for stopping by, Phil.

Just let the idiot savant heave his precious ball and eat his all-crystal diet and sleep in his cryo-pajamas at the bottom of a silent, subterranean lake in peace.

When I put a can of Hamm’s, a rusted 20lb dumbbell, 16 bags of beef jerky (plain), and a pair of sturdy cargo shorts I bought on sale at Kohl’s into a 1992 Ford Ranger with 210k miles on it and parked that thing in the blazing hot sun I never knew the child I created in that hot fusion cell would be born as a fully…