"I'll tell you what the trouble with is-is is."

He'll be too busy eating his delicious chocolate cake to pay any attention.

It's one of my favorite Dylan songs, actually.

Calm down. Go outside and smoke a Chesterfield.

That makes sense. They weren't born in the nineteenth century.

Trust me, it's not the asparagus.

Eh, if it saves me a few bucks…

If Trump were to fight his removal under the 25th amendment it actually becomes more difficult than impeachment.

Cleveland wasn't shot. I think you're thinking of Garfield.

Sure, if you're only in it for the money.

Yeah, it's amazing what arbitrary stuff could save lives. Like Art Spiegelman's dad pretending he knew how to fix shoes managed to save him from being sent to the gas chamber and got him enough extra food from the Kapo that he didn't starve to death.

Or don't they have any on-call staff anywhere that could have made it to Louisville by the next day? There are literally like five solutions to their problem that are better than what they did.

I'm a very picky eater, but asparagus is one of the few green things that doesn't really bother me. I don't understand the people who get super-excited about it though.

Is your friend Carl Weathers?

Why? It's in season.

For some reason, I'm not particularly bothered by the scanners, the pat-downs, the metal detectors, the bag x-rays or any of that. I just really, really, really hate having to take off my shoes.

I'm sure there's a shitload of airports in that particular part of the country. Why couldn't they fly their staff to Lexington or Cincinnati or Indianapolis or fucking anywhere and have them drive to Louisville?

It's true; even when the trains were full to capacity, Hitler never asked anyone if they wanted to get off.

Like Inspector Renault, I blow with the wind.

On the one hand, all this is terrible, and I don't particularly want to patronize a business that treats their customers like this. On the other, there are several different United flights I've been considering booking lately, and this will probably help make them a little more affordable. And it's not like the same…