Actually, being in favor of the truth is partisan now. The Republicans have been opposed to the truth without exceptions for quite some time.

When they called him on it, he said, "Are you crying? There's no crying in baseball!"

No, he was 28th president Woody Wilson.

Is there a word that means "miracle" only in a negative context?

That might have more to do with the fact that he had no access to tomatoes.

Why not? Most of the rest of the administration comes from the nineteenth century.

Yes, but not professionally. It's always been his passion, but it hasn't been that long that he's been able to monetize it.

I was picturing the alternate universe where the USFL is a successful sports league. I guess that'd be pretty much the same as the world you're imagining, only with football games being played for almost the entire year. So, basically what I'd call a light dystopia.

I'd vote for your Crazy Puerto Rican Friend over Trump.

Suze Orman stayed at hotel I worked at a few years back. When she left, a bunch of people who helped her out during her stay, like the front desk manager, the concierge and so on, all got free copies of her book. You know, instead of a tip.

That doesn't really go along with the reduced sex drive.

She never cared much for "The Critic" either.

If cats could vote most of them would be Republicans. This is why I don't have a cat.

Family Circus is much too warm and sentimental for him. He prefers humor that's based on humiliating people, I'd bet. Preferably women, minorities, poor people. You know, the people who don't matter.

Political dynasties really rub me the wrong way, but a candidate being a member of one is a pretty small point against them.

He won't want to be king once he finds out that droit de seigneur was never really a thing.

No he's not. He left office in 1989.

It won't be a Kardashian and it won't be Pewdiepie. Old people do most of the voting in this country. They haven't heard of Pewdiepie and they aren't sure who any of the Kardashians are. The next president will be Stacy Keach or something.

Stedman Graham? Shouldn't she pick a running mate people have heard of?

Well, we know she can get at least twelve people to vote in her favor.