More like a third. But it's not like anyone lives there. OK, I live north of San Francisco, but not very far north.

I'd feel bad for her, but she ended up owning two movies that were better than Dragonheart. (OK, I haven't seen First Knight, but I have seen Dragonheart, and I have to assume that almost anything is better than that.)

My girlfriend still gives me shit about the time she got me an iPod to replace the one I lost and I asked her if she'd be offended if I returned it and got a bigger one.

I almost lost my shit the other day over a political article on what was supposedly a news site that described something as being "in tact." It amazes me that people can go through their whole lives thinking that a phrase or word is something completely different than what it is.

That's pretty low on the pun scale.

This place is described as both "a southern California bakery," and "San Francisco based." Not to nitpick, but…

I actually slightly prefer the original version, from about ten years earlier. It clearly was made with a lower budget, and the performances might not be quite as good, but the plot makes a bit more sense. They're both pretty good, though.

I missed a lot of school, but I haven't called in sick at work in years, and probably have only missed a little over a week in eighteen years. If school would have just paid me to be there, I would have shown up a lot more.

I also went to high school every day between 1996 and 2000. I graduated in 1994, though.

Just like how Trump says you can't walk down the street in Chicago without getting shot.

I feel like Lincoln was pretty much in the modern Republican mainstream. He was opposed to slavery, partially for humanitarian reasons and partially because they undermined the power of industrialists, but he opposed blacks voting, serving on juries or intermarrying with whites. So really pretty standard for the GOP…

Most of Dusseldorf is a no-go zone now!

Is anyone even watching House of Cards anymore or have we reached a point where it isn't entertaining since it can't keep up with real life?

Since the Germans would probably be the ones fighting for rights for nonwhite people, I think it's pretty obvious which side he'd pick.

If Austrians are so great, why do they get such lousy ratings?

There's been a lot of people bitching lately about pesticides being used on grapevines and how trace amounts might get into the wine and all I can think is, "There's no way a few micrograms of bug spray can be as bad for you as 750 milliliters of wine."

Nothing a food service worker hates to hear more than, "I'm trying to stay away from gluten." If you legitimately have an allergy or something, I'm happy to help you, but I don't especially want to get reamed by the kitchen because I'm trying to accommodate your fad diet.

It's from the rat poison they adulterate it with because fuck regulations.

I'll have the Jill Steinlager.

Spunk Ultra. All the taste of Spunk but without the carbs.