“I want chicken nuggets and a beer”

you mean S&L, right?

The stadium has been around for nearly 20 years, so it’s not like it’s new, I’d say we call it Old Milwaukee Park.

I took a shower this morning hoping for wet water and I got it.

I’m a girl, so all my life I have been told that my clothing sends messages to other people. If I wear a skirt that is a little too short or a shirt that shows a little too much cleavage, I am apparently communicating that I consent to being groped or worse.

The only person who saw all this coming was Tony Romo. 

If he’s such a great prognosticator, then why didn’t he open the broadcast with, “Everybody should just go to bed right now, because in a few hours you will all want to kill yourselves.”

In fairness AOC does inside the conservative punditry’s heads.

This is a helluva way to audition to be Trevor Bauer’s social media manager. 

Can’t get fired if you never get paid in the first place.

Road workers aren’t yet exactly sure what caused the sign to fall

Trump tries to act like a serious adult and some media idiots praise for him for finally making the pivot to being ‘presidential’

I think a bunch of people overestimate the abilities of elite-level athletes.

a black woman.

There’s a saying, “To be African American is to be African without history and American without privilege.”

As the youngest in my family, I know those words all too well.