I hope he’s lying on his deathbed, years and years from now, and his last thought is “I never. convinced. LooseSeals...”

My sister said that!!! Welp, he’s going to be waiting awhile! :)

He married the woman he dated immediately after me so great? But he has continued to bug me every now and then. I’m honestly not sure why. There’s nothing I can do for him. We dated for three weeks in 2006. He only knew a fraction of me, and I’m a fraction of 2006 me in 2017. A fraction of a fraction? Whatever idea he…

I once dated a guy who was a huge Dem, ACLU donor, Obama fan, etc. He said the following statement to me, which precipitated me never speaking to him again soon after.

This isn’t the first time Matt Damon has royally fucked up either. He also thinks there’s no issue with a lack of women/minorities in power in Hollywood.

“I listened to Limp Bizkit, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Macy Gray, Nine Inch Nails—that was a weird phase for me,”

Or she’s older than she says hehe

Just a reminder that the TSA has an 80-95% failure rate to identify these items. This is just part of the 5-20% they actually managed to locate.

I lost a folding wallet knife the same way. Got it as a gift, put it in my wallet to be nice to the gift-giver even though I’d never use such a thing. It must have caught on the edge of the wallet flap during a wallet change and was left in there... I cycle wallets kind of frequently because, I dunno I’m allowed to.…

Coming back from Orlando my wife had packed a large bottle of shampoo in a carry on. Along with my kids earbuds, which were all jumbled up because earbuds.

If people would stop trying to take guns, knives, and explosives onto aircraft, we wouldn’t need them. Until then, the TSA is going to have this shit to contend with that justifies their existence. #ifonlycommonsensewascommon

Why can’t I bring my gardening hoe?

Meanwhile, 4 years ago in college, my entire junior class flew from Pittsburgh to Boston for a field trip and accidentally smuggled 39 blades (X-Actos and box cutters) through security...both ways. Architecture students generally forget that they always have model-making tools in their bags.

That’s happened to me lots of times, but I’ve never been caught. TSA is a joke - it is insanely easy to get stuff past them.

I really thought I’d see my mistake on here. I had thrown a folding EDC knife into my work backpack (lots of deep pockets) weeks before traveling and completely forgot about it. I didn’t realize this until I got stopped on the return leg of the trip, but I actually got through security at MSP with it. I ended up…

The Best

“TSA is there to keep us all safe”

“Please don’t pack grenades”