No one cares about their BCRD plan or tests until they shit the bed.

No one wants to pay for incident response analysts and a good CISO until they need it.

-someone in InfoSec

Yeah, students have asked me for advice on this, too. Specifically female students. I always couch things in terms of my own experience and never go beyond the “ask”. I was glad some female role models reminded me that if my career was so important to me, I would not sacrifice it for someone unwilling to let my career…

No. Academia. Faculty members just say whatever they want.

When I managed grad students, I did have them *ask* me for advice - specifically female grad students who wanted to know how I managed - and I would be honest about what worked for *me*. However, I never, ever gave unsolicited marital advice. I was there to…

My boss at the time suggested I read it. I read it.

She later told me not to marry my now-husband because he would seriously limit my career growth and ruin my life (because he already had kids and that was “viewed poorly”).

Ironically, he’s a stay-at-home parent allowing me to chase my dreams in leadership which…

I work in IT policy and am visible enough that I do not publicly comment on these things. I work for a company that does not police what I say. I work a lot on local advocacy and state advocacy but not related to the area of policy where I work. It is a big no-no. Being in leadership is complicated and I do not want…

Soooooo many gifted children (especially gifted women) have had this experience. I would say it’s like that for most of the women I know with ADHD.

I have very, very serious OCD and depression as a teenager (also PTSD which I now know was a very real driver of the other two) and they haven’t gone away but are much…

“Worth it” applies to anything I want to put in my body so I would agree with that. I would leave out the calories because, quite frankly, food should bring joy and fuel your body or else it is SO not worth it.

I also realize that people like my sister who have binge eating disorders may not know when to stop so the…

I get it but saying “healthy” is the issue.  “Worth it” is a great way to describe it.  DD just sucks.  It really is the worst.

I think teaching people about good eating does that, though. I am in ED recovery. I am trying to raise a child without it bubbling over to her. That’s not being sensitive. It’s being intentional.

But, really, “good” food is also a luxury.  There is a lot tied up into statements about food, I guess.

But everyone knows this already.  Shaming desserts for being “unhealthy” isn’t really helpful then, is it?  It’s just a shamey part of disordered diet culture.

Yes but shaming calories and saying foods are “healthy” or “unhealthy” is just ridiculous and plays into shitty diet culture. I don’t blame Prue. I blame culture for suggesting this. I also wish she would stop because eating intuitively and learning your own hunger cues (or re-learning them) is how to get “healthy”…

Yep.  I also think our kids stay in diapers so long since our childcare centers often do not have the staffing/ability to assist children in toilet training and parents are basically required to give up their Christmas break one year to do so.  I know this because I was forced to do it.  It was the only time I got…

You can ask! In fact, I encourage you to ask the administration what they pay teachers and if there is a range, ask them what they pay someone with an Associates/Bachelors in ECE. All of our teachers are required to have a BA/BS at least in education or a related field but they are paid like classroom teachers would…

It’s amazing what young children can learn through self-directed exploration. I am glad that the school (a Title I no less) my kid will go to next year when she enters kinder has multi-age spanish immersion programs and a whole host of other “roving” experiences so we don’t have to worry about her getting bored. The…

I live in a lower CoL than a coastal place area and send my kid to a private day school (pre-k) for an affordable price. It is about $12,000/yr to send a kid there FT. We only need 9-3 so we only pay about 8 grand a year (my partner is home FT and freelances while she is at school). For a newborn, it easily costs more…

Some cultures do start early with “elimination communication” but they are societies where women tend to stay home for the early years and are tasked with constantly being aware of when their baby needs to go.  These societies also, of course, have no issues with a child eliminating basically whenever in a travel…

I don’t wash my kid every day. I only wash my hair a few times a week because my scalp gets really gross.

If my kid is just dusty, she’s not getting a bath.  If she’s disgusting, she will be bathed.  She’s almost five and she is so filthy that after she bathes, I am stuck cleaning the damn thing out and scrubbing at it…

The “natural” parenting and “attachment” parenting industries have romanticized parenting in developing countries in a very, very privileged and white way. It is very gross to see my friends who are otherwise very conscious to racism and hating colonialism feel for the same neocolonialist bullshit. They don’t seem to…

Safety concerns are real and actually do occur on an actual shop floor (my mother is an engineer and has to dress differently when she checks out a shop build vs. works in an office) but I legit could wear a t-shirt and yoga leggings daily and never face retribution working remotely in IT.

Dress codes for safety are…

In my case, the comments about my body being “too sexual” (even at 11) came from teachers. I got boobs overnight (and my period) in 5th grade and when I made it to 6th grade, suddenly my body was shameful and needed covered. Then, I covered it too much and was demonized for what I was “trying to hide”. These comments…