You buy ice because you never know when you're going to end up with a head bag, which is full of heady goodness.

Lots of environmentally-friendly cars being tipped over. THAAAAAAANKS.

For your voodoo penis:

Sure you did, Schmoopie.

I was a bank teller for a few summers then a couple months after college while I looked for a real job, and it's really easy to count 150+ bills per minute, and that's a conservative estimate. Even if you only did that twice per hour during an 8-hour work day, you'd gross $624,000 per year.

I always worry about getting jelly-legged, falling over and knocking myself out on the toilet seat. That's no way for your in-laws to find you, laying on their bathroom floor with pants around your ankes and your cum floating around in their toilet.

I look forward to the follow-up stories from guys caught masturbating in their offices at work after reading Kylie's.

This guy definitely has multiple porn site subscriptions.

Bag of rosin.

Ditto.

I think he's actually probably right at the end of the VHS porn era. Graduated in '99 - I'm two years younger than he is, and there was still plenty of VHS porn around.

.

Jeff Hornycek.

They're a little busy making sure they find jobs in Durham for the parents of basketball recruits.

Because sometimes the award goes to Jarvis Jones, other times it goes to Chad Lavalais.

I really wish people would stop bringing up the SEC DPOY award as if that matters. Yes, there have been a number of great players to win that award, but that alone doesn't give it any value if there's a weaker field of candidates in a particular season.

What if the PGA made the Birdie Juice Rule a mandatory thing on tour?

We need to get a team of eggheads together to do a serious statistical analysis of Dating Naked from a "growers vs. showers" perspective.

Saw this one recently, last question in "Fast Money" was "part of the body that starts with the letter T".

Not Miguel Cabrera, Alex Gonzalez.