I couldn’t care less about Ruiz’s cardiovascular system strug-a-ling...

...windmill-like right hands...

That’s not true; if you tried to hurl a Big Mac past him there's no way he just lets it fly on by. 

You sound like one of those people who insist that if someone doesn’t get convicted for a crime, it means that the alleged crime never actually even occurred in the first place.

I don’t think it’s necessary. The odds of taking a cricket ball between the eyes are about the same as taking a home run to the face. Even if you’re not paying attention, the crowd will let you know it’s coming. It’s not like having a scorching line drive foul ball come at you; in cricket no matter where you’re…

What year? I was there from 94-98.

No, but that is only because I am extremely uninformed about all things Drake* and prefer to keep it that way.

*sigh* Nobody gets me.

My wife was very confused when I started ranting about how exciting the shot that hit the post was. “Why is hockey on? Do you even care about either of these teams?” she asked. She did not, however, look up from her game of 2048 Bricks, because that shit is as addictive as nicotine-laced crack.

His twitter feed is the Platonic ideal of a Trump voter's twitter feed.

Methinks it is due to the fact everyone knew that it was a (poorly run) hatchet job.

For real. Remember the how quiet they tried to keep things in the U.S. Attorney firing scandal (where they fired a bunch of prosecutors for not manufacturing enough bogus “voter fraud” cases)? Or the way they actually spent months and months trying to build a consensus for declaring war on Iraq, instead of just…

“No, it’s really not. But I do wish we’d thought of it.” - Karl Rove

And asked their setup man to stop using “Deutschland Erwache” as his entrance music.

“All right Andy, just play it cool...”

It’s a shame that the throw didn’t get past the first baseman. You can really benefit from those unforced two base errors, as I learned on my prom night.

Not to mention that being a star on a college team is fun. A childhood friend of mine warmed the bench for Syracuse and even he got treated like a celebrity on and off campus.

Just how much of an asshole do you have to be that Thiel is a more desirable outcome?

And due to blatant gerrymandering, these dunces have outsized representation in the state and nation.