They thought it was dead so these high school boys jumped on it, scooped it up and scored while a bunch of people watched in astonishment.

STICK TO BEING A STERILE ABOMINATION

The Chiefs only had 8 passing touchdowns? Yikes! I'm surprised they made it through the year without someone trying to off themselves in the parking lot.

I say this as an Eagles fan: I think Andy Reid is capable of winning a Super Bowl. Of course it's a race against the clock in a city known for BBQ.

Are we sure this is a current listing?

Tebow celebrated by overthrowing himself a party.

Todd Haley calls breast cancer "the jug flu."

Children beware, if you attend Penn State football camp, you are likely to get your shit ruined.

Now if only fans would stop giving it inexplicably high TV ratings, maybe we could kill the damn thing.

Spaz, Downy, Midget, Cripple, Retard, Handicapped

Hmmm.... wouldn't it be funny if we find out that Jeff Bezos was doing the Glomar Explorer thing for the CIA a la Howard Hughes. Salvaging NASA relics is a great front for something else :)

Front mounted horse heads. You're not fooling anyone, asshole.

funny, that's also Paula Deen's contact name for Anthony Bourdain.

*DING* WHO TURNED ON THEIR F'N IPAD?!!