In related news, the Vatican Cinnabon franchise, PapalBon, has seen a 60% increase in web traffic.

What suit?

How could we forget, it was easily the most important basket he's ever made.

“That’s coward stuff” - the guy who throws bats at people

Then he said to the tree,“May no one ever eat fruit from you again.” And his disciples heard him say it.

What’s more, I’m pretty sure most Cubans hate big waves.

Look at that 12 to 6 curve!

You’ve forgotten that Sarah will die in childbirth.

Having concluded the portion of the day in which he does and says reasonable things, Blank returned to overseeing construction of a taxpayer-subsidized, robot sphincter stadium.

This is why the NFL won’t let you have their YouTube videos.

It’s fascinating to watch pathological liars attempt to keep track of their narrative threads. He will not understand the name calling—even if he bothered to read the previous article—because, unlike the rest of us, he believes everything he says and is therefore above reproach in his own mind.

Perhaps the most unfathomable thing in all of sports is that there are still thousands of people who will pay lots of money to an evil shitbag to watch a terrible team go 3-13.

The calendar’s as fat as Jay Gruden.

Human: No way you’re getting my hot dog, bud. That’s called cannibalism!

Sometimes you have to read between the pinstripes to get the real meaning.

Does having Brian McCann on your team instantly turn everyone into a choad or does it take some time?

But there was something different about Paul O’Neill. I can’t quite put my finger on it but he Worked hard, played Hard, was really Invested in the Team, and was Everything else you want in a teammate.

Didn’t the Yankees employ Paul O’Neill, who did this after basically every pitch?