i have no idea what will happen in this debate!! we havent seen a candidate (and I use that term loosely) like Trump since Thomas Jefferson called John Adams a hermaphrodite. how much screaming will he do? how will Hillary react to being screamed at? what crazy ass fantasy will Trump push in front of the nation? how…

yea im split. if it’s dangerous, if inmates are risking their lives to shave off time from sentences, then that’s pretty fucked up, but if its just like community service-type stuff then I guess Im ok with it? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What’s inside this elusive chest?

face of a 14-year-old, arms of a street-fighting anime character? Kentucky is confusing.

um hello what about our lord Jesus Christ

if we dont incarcerate every third person then california will literally burn to the ground because not burning to the ground is too expensive or something

ETA: will begging get me followed on at least The Slot? i mean i get it if Jez is completely off limits, as i am a dick, but im suffocating over here. pppppllleeeaaaassseeee?

god i hope my dealer hits me back soon

the trick is to glue your pants to your thighs. the rashes are not fun, but we all must suffer for fashion

my IQ has dropped so much this year through osmosis

are we positive that they havent just used that one diagram for 30 years?

it is our duty as empathetic Americans to do this nation a great service and ban strip malls

while Hillary was in the Senate we voted to give W the legal authority to investigate and impose sanctions on Iraq only to have him jump the gun and kill 100,000 civilians

i have been chugging high fructose corn syrup in remembrance

when is Jezebel going to recognize that “Silk Spectre” is a fucking awesome codename

“’ghostly sleepwalkers,’ a train wreck”

“She has evinced a lamentable penchant for secrecy”

goddamn that’s a pretty cat. people keep posting their ugly cats and are like “look at my cute cat!” and I’m just like “gtfo”

im nearly positive one can catch toxoplasmosis through cat pictures, be forewarned