almost. im talking about super-presence. im talking about ultra-inspiring life-lesson-living high-energy mega dadding over here.

uh cocaine obv. how else do you think one becomes a neurosurgeon or stock trader or best dad ever

a) The Offspring

ah it looks like theyve chosen to develop more stuff that no one wants instead of fixing the terrible battle system, creating any kind of end game, or including the features showed in their commercials! well played Niantic. never change

jesus why not Person 1, Person 2, and Person 3

ugh such media bias. the struggle is real. sad

Lady Cops: Estrogen Justice

um im pretty sure Michelle Obama wasnt in Slovenia in the 90s

do you like me as more than just a friend

i named my daughter Blogosphere and we couldnt be happier

i just wish kotaku had more articles about shitty cash-grabbing fremium ipad games, as that is currently my wheelhouse. like i still need to finish Witcher 3, but I also need to Candy Army Bird Crush until 4am for a week straight

remember, most vocaloids like humanoids who are confident and funny. as you approach your vocaloid, make sure to exhibit these traits by punching all lesser men around you while also wearing a clown nose. hilarious!

lol this is cute, thinking engineers are Real People. “A Sensorimotor Learning Framework for Object Categorization.” sounds like we’re all going to die. did the world learn nothing from

oh what a double-edged sword. released from prison to live in Indiana. this is a terribly sad story

“ARE YOU A FUCKING LOSER? UGLY CHICKS IN YOUR AREA ARE LOOKING TO KEEP YOU FROM KILLING YOUSELF.”

this gif is the best rock-paper-scissors game ive ever seen. +1

im just here for the pearl-clutching that happened the last time there was a Jez article about porn. someone please think about the rhetorical children

donald trump is on so much cocaine that using “I’m on cocaine right now ha ha ha ha ha!” as his signature has become completely legitimate due to its consistent repetition

im nearly positive he wont release his tax returns because there is an entire sub-section devoted to cocaine. gotta declare that shit